03 如何让应用文语篇更具连贯性
应用文写作中的语篇错误例析
1审题错误及其应对策略
审题错误主要包括对文章要求的误读和题材判断失误:考生对书面表达试题要求理解失
误，或是由于平时积累的语言素材少，导致审题时不能充分理解命题人意图，导致写出的
作文“文不对题”，这是学科素养差的直接体现。
英语作文大致分为应用文文体和开放性话题两大类。应用文可分为求职信，建议信，
道歉信，感谢信，咨询信等，而开放性文体的话题则更灵活多变，直接考查考生的语言素
养和学科综合素质。第一次作文The Person Who Influences Me Most与2020年全国一卷
的The Person I Respect Most要求类似，属于写人类文章，让学生描述对他影响最深的人。
学生在审这类题目时，要审清题目，注意写人类、叙事类和书信类文章的不同，从人物的
外貌特征、性格特点、典型事例等方面进行描写。另外，第八次作文样本通知和第九次作
文样本活动报道是两个完全不同的两个话题，考生却经常将其混淆。究其原因，就是学生
不会审题，没有准确把握时态。而导致审题错误的最根本原因是考生对于第二语言和汉语
之间的转换机制不理解，在学习和使用语言的过程中形成语言意识和语感差，不具备基本
的理解和表达第二语言意义的能力。
2.语篇错误及其应对策略
英语应用文写作要求内容简明，结构清晰，而文章的清晰度和语篇中主题的表现，各
部分之间的逻辑关系有着密不可分的关系。语篇错误分为宏观语篇错误和微观语篇错误。
宏观层面上的语篇错误是指整个文章层面进行分析，也会以段落为单位进行分析，段落之
间衔接不当，甚至有些段落出现偏离主题，缺乏逻辑。逻辑性错误是学生英语学科核心素
养中思维品质的体现，即考生的思维在逻辑性、批判性、创新性等方面所表现的能力和水
平。英语写作中语篇错误的出现与学生英语学科素养较低有极大关系，学生在书面表达行
文时，不能从跨文化视角观察和认识世界，并对写作内容做出正确的判断，导致其作文未
能完成规定的写作要求，无法让阅读者理解作文的写作目的和意图。而微观层面上的语篇
错误包括歧义、衔接词的误用和过度使用。宏观层面的语篇错误是指段落之间，甚至整篇
文章脱离了主题，即偏离主题错误;微观层面上的语篇错误是指句子之间的衔接出现错误。
（1）偏离主题
例如，在考查邀请信的应用文写作中，大部分同学都能够按照正确的格式要求进行，
但有些同学英语基础太过薄弱，只能记住格式，但在格式框架之下，将主题要求的详细内容进行写作时，出现了主题不明确，逻辑混乱的问题，甚至有位同学的作文完全无逻辑，
在写完开头邀请之后，直接把阅读原文抄在作文中，例如:
My name is Li Hua. I write to invite you to attend the 100th anniversary of the
founding of the CPC.
The employees control the robots from home, using the Internet. For example, if
someone can't move or speak; they can use advanced software to type.
Looking forward to your early reply.
（2）句子衔接错误
有些学生的作文缺乏连贯性，段落和句子之间缺少衔接词，甚至有些同学只使用一个
自然段写完全文，全部使用短句子，根本没有衔接词，整篇文章没有逻辑性，上下文之间
没有流畅感，是单独的个体，没有层次和结构。在新高考改革后，应用文的字数缩短到了
80字，在答题卡上留给学生写应用文的行数和空间都缩小了，在这样的条件下，学生更应
该注重衔接词的使用，改卷教师通过衔接词可以看出学生作文结构和层次，改卷老师也能
很快找到学生的作文是否内容清晰，是否有条理，题目所要求的内容是否齐全。
在新高考改革下，英语应用文的字数被压缩，为了更好地突出重点和内容，衔接词是
必不可少的，但大多数同学没有重视衔接词的使用，只是用简单的序数词或是比较简短的
衔接词来连接上下文。例如:
(1) We will hold the anniversary at 8:00 a.m, at our school hall. Our school have
planned a lot of shows that came from Chinese history. Our school hold the anniversary
to make us learn more about the history and to encourage us to study harder. I believe
you will be happy if you attend it.
(2) First, our headmaster will give as speech about the 100th anniversary of the CPC
Then our school has prepared a show about Chinese culture. Finally, all people will sing
a song together.
例句(1)中，学生只使用了短句子，从头到尾没有使用衔接词，这会使得改卷老师无法
快速定位到学生写作重点，没有条理性，也使得作文看起来杂乱无章，完全靠短句子堆砌
出来，留给老师的卷面印象不好，分也不高。
例句(2)中学生只会使用一些简单的序数词和单词作为衔接词使用，过于单调，字数也
过少。在这种情况下，可以适当使用一些词组，在增加层次感之外，也可以增加一些字数
换为“to start with"增加句子长度。同时也能吸引改卷老师的注意。可以把“first"改成"tobegin with"；"second”可以转换为“what's more"或"in addition"；"finally”可以换成“last
but not least"。
此外，衔接词使用频率较高的有:and, but, like, also, although, not only... but
also,without any shadow of doubt, at last, therefore, in a word, not with
standing/notwithstanding, in order to。增补类连接词、让步类连接词及总结类连接词等是学
生文章中出现密度较高的衔接接词。
应用文写作中使用较少的衔接词有：instead, because of, for this reason, thanks to,
additionally, secondly,despite, while it is true, further, for another, in short, in other
words、say namely, in fact, frankly, in many cases、so far, after that, in spite of,
moreover, in a sharp contrast, in conclusion, in brief, simultaneously等。然而，学生过少
使用的这些衔接词是学生在英语学习中需要及时掌握并学会运用的，也是需要教师在应用
文写作教学中重点讲解的内容。
词汇衔接手段错误及应对分析
1.简单重复
统计数据显示，两种体裁的作文无论是在高分组还是低分组都使用了大量的简单重复，
所以不可避免其错误率也相对较高，其中过度使用占了大部分的错误。
例1:Many people like watching films in spare time, films are convenient and interesting. In
the same time, some of the people like reading books instead, these books have include more
details and more wonderful sentences. As for me, I like watching films than reading books. Films
are more interesting than books.
该样本选自学生议论文写作，在仅仅44个单词里面，films和books分别出现了4次，
interesting,reading也都重复出现。有些是可以直接省略或者用代词替代的，例如第二个
films和第二个books就可以用which替换，不仅避免重复而且从句的使用也会使句子显得
高级，有利于增加阅卷老师的好感度。如此频繁地使用简单重复只会使得文章读起来枯燥
单调乏味，相应的就影响写作质量。
高中生在英语写作中之所以喜欢过多的使用简单重复，一方面是因为高中生词汇贫乏，
而简单重复又是最直接简单的词汇衔接;另一方面是因为受母语的影响。英语是重形合的语
言，而汉语重义合。汉语经常是采取重复相同词语的方法来增加句子的凝聚力。而英语写
作中是很忌讳重复的语言，提倡词语的变换，所以英语往往使用各种衔接手段将信息连接
起来，以确保句子的衔接与连贯。在写作中，高中生往往没有意识到母语与英语的差异，所以经常使用大量的简单重复。
2.复杂重复
复杂重复是一种有效避免过度使用简单重复的方法，且可以增加用词的多样性，达到
文章的衔接。对比简单重复，复杂重复的使用量要少很多，前面已经提到复杂重复包括同
一词素，但句法成分不同;或拼写读音相同，但语法功能不同，这两种情况在学生的作文中
都很常见，如:
例2:Someone say that they like reading books.It goes without saying that reading books can
make us clam down.
例 3:I feel sorry for your terrible experience, but we always experience all kinds of
difficulties in our life.
在例2中的say和saying属于同一词素，但他们的句法成分是不同的。例 3中的两个
experience拼写读音完全是相同的，但语法功能不同。尽管学生使用复杂重复的数量很少，
但是错误率在两种体裁中都是相当高的。这说明高中生在词的曲折变化和派生变化的使用
上是存在问题的。
例4: Don't remember the bad thing and full of sad.
例5:We respect your choose.
诸如例4和例5这样的错误在高中生写作中频频出现，称为语际负迁移。汉语重义合，
对句子成分的要求没有英语严格，而英语重形合，不同的句子成分所使用的词语是不一样
的。而我们的学生通常直接将汉语意思翻译成英语。例 4中就是汉语意思直接翻译过来，
而介词后面应该接的是名词而不是形容词，所以sad应该改为sadness。例5中的choose应
该改为相应的名词choice o
例6: She hope you work hard and live a happy life.
例7:Many things is wonderful.
类似例6和例7这样的词类错误出现频率也很高。因为英语是曲折语，以词形变化作
为表示语法关系的主要手段;而汉语是孤立语，没有丰富的词形变化。所以高中生在写作的
时候在英汉之间转换，很容易出现错误。复杂重复还包括名词单复数变化，动词时态和人
称的变化，因此例6中的两个动词hope和live都应该是第三人称单数形式;例7中的be动
词应该是复数are o
3.同义词和反义词
同义词和反义词的使用可以避免重复，增加语言的丰富性。但是不恰当的使用正反义
词，则会使句子很奇怪。例8:But we can't give up life,we have to stick to.
例9:I'm very sad about your daughter's death,I know you also feel awful.
在例8中，学生使用了表达相反意思的短语，give up和stick to形成前后的对比。但是
末尾的stick to在此处使用不恰当，应该换为move on，虽然表达的汉语意思是一样的，但
是stick to是不能单独至于末尾的。这与学生平时脱离语境学习单词和短语是有关系的，只
是单纯的记住其意思不知用法。在例9中， sad和awful是想表达相近的意思，但是根据
语境后者的伤心程度应该更强，所以awful一词在此处使用不恰当，应该换为painful效果
更好。
4.上下义词和概括词
从错误统计中可以看出，高中生作文中上下义词和概括词的错误使用相对比较少，尤
其是上下义词使用很少，所以错误就相对更少。文章中概括词可以起到很好的避免重复的
作用，就是当具体名词在下文中再次出现，"the+概括词”可以构成同指照应。但是过多的
使用概括词则会使文章内容模糊，不具体。
例10: You shouldn't drink too much alcohol and beer.
在例10中的alcohol和beer，学生用and连接表示二者是并列关系，但是alcohol是指
的所有含酒精的东西，包括了beer，所以二者是上下义词关系。
例11:I deeply show mercy to your thing.
例12: Forget the bad thing and continue to live a normal life.
在概括词的使用上，高中生的错误大多都是过度使用。在例11中的thing是指的具体
的人，所以可以直接换成daughter。例12中的the bad thing可以直接用代词it替换，这样
也可以避免句子冗长。
策略应用实践练习
1．上周末你校举办了“用英语讲中国故事”的演讲活动，请你为校英文报写一篇报道，内
容包括：1. 活动目的；2. 活动内容；3. 活动反响。
注意：1. 词数100词左右；
2. 文中不得透露个人及学校真实信息。
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2．假如你是李华，你的美国笔友Jack对中国倡导的德智体美劳“五育教育”中的美育很
感兴趣，请你写一封电子邮件向他做一介绍。内容包括：
1. 你对美育的理解;
2. 你校美育开展情况;
3. 欢迎他来你校实地考察。
注意：
1. 词数100左右;
2. 短文的开头已为你写好。
3. 参考词汇：美育：aesthetic education 实地考察：on-site inspection
Dear Jack,
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Yours,
Li Hua
3．假定你是李华，你校英语周举行“讲中国故事”活动，请任择一处中国古典建筑介绍，
内容包括：
1. 历史；
2. 艺术特色；
3. 文化意义和地位。
注意： 1. 词数100左右；
2. 可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。
Hello, everyone,
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4．假定你是某国际学校“跨文化论坛”的主持人李华，本期节目邀请了中国书法家Mr.
Wang 给学生做讲座，请你用英语写一份节目开场白，内容包括：1.表示欢迎；2.专家介绍；
3.节目简介。
注意：1.写作词数应为80左右。2.可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。
参考词汇：书法家 calligrapher
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5．假定你是李华，你的英国朋友 Jim在参加“学汉字大赛”（Chinese Characters
Competition）前给你发邮件征求你的建议，但你因故未能及时回复。请你给他回复一封邮
件，内容包括：
1.表示歉意；
2.解释原因；
3.询问参赛情况。
注意：
1.写作词数应为80左右；
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
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参考答案
1.
Last weekend, our school held an English speech contest themed “Telling Chinese Stories in
English” to enhance our abilities of speaking English and deepen our understanding of Chineseculture.
The activity consisted of three parts. First, every contestant delivered his or her speech and
then the judges asked some relevant questions. The last part was evaluating and presenting awards
to winners.
The activity turned out to be such a great success that it was highly praised by most of the
participants. Thanks to this activity, we get to realize it is our responsibility to spread Chinese
culture to the world.
【写作指导】本篇书面表达属于新闻报道。要求考生报道上周末学校举办的“用英语讲中
国故事”的演讲活动。
【解析】1.词汇积累
比赛：contest→competition
提高：enhance→improve
包括：consist of→be made up of
意识到：realize→be aware
2.句式拓展
简单句变复合句
原句：Last weekend, our school held an English speech contest themed “Telling Chinese Stories
in English” to enhance our abilities of speaking English and deepen our understanding of Chinese
culture.
拓展句：Last weekend, our school held an English speech contest themed “Telling Chinese
Stories in English”, which was aimed at enhancing our abilities of speaking English and
deepening our understanding of Chinese culture.
【创新表达】【高分句型1】The activity turned out to be such a great success that it was highly
praised by most of the participants.（运用了such…that引导的结果状语从句）
【高分句型2】Thanks to this activity, we get to realize it is our responsibility to spread Chinese
culture to the world.（运用了省略that的宾语从句）
2．Dear Jack,
Nice to receive your email. Here let me give you a brief introduction to the aesthetic
education in our school. In my opinion, aesthetic education means the education to cultivate
students’ ability to recognize, love, and create beauty, which plays a great role in our school
education. It can enrich the cultural and spiritual life of schools, stimulate students’ emotionalexperiences, help cultivate noble sentiments, improve socialist consciousness, and inspire students
to strive for the realization of communist ideals and the creation of all beautiful things.
In our daily life, our school often arranges for students to go to nature so that they can fully
experience the beauty of reality and art. Besides, colorful aesthetic activities will be held, such as
giving comments on heated issues and news at home and abroad, and having a debate over some
opinions, to cultivate their correct views on social beauty and their ability to feel it.
If convenient, you are warmly welcomed to have an on-site inspection.
Yours,
Li Hua
【写作指导】本篇书面表达是一篇应用文。要求考生给美国笔友Jack介绍中国倡导的德智
体美劳“五育教育”中的美育。
【解析】1.词汇积累
培养：cultivate→develop
辨别：recognize→ identify
角色：role→ part
激励：stimulate→ motivate
2.句式拓展
简单句变复合句
原句：Besides, colorful aesthetic activities will be held, such as giving comments on heated
issues and news at home and abroad, and having a debate over some opinions, to cultivate their
correct views on social beauty and their ability to feel it.
拓展句：Besides, colorful aesthetic activities will be held, such as giving comments on heated
issues and news at home and abroad, and having a debate over some opinions, in order that they
can cultivate their correct views on social beauty and their ability to feel it.
【创新表达】[高分句型1]
In my opinion, aesthetic education means the education to cultivate students’ ability to recognize,
love, and create beauty, which plays a great role in our school education. (运用了which引导的非
限制性定语从句)
[高分句型2]
In our daily life, our school often arranges for students to go to nature so that they can fully
experience the beauty of reality and art.(运用了so that引导的目的状语从句)3．Hello, everyone,
Today, let’s visit Suzhou and get a glimpse of the classical gardens there.
The classical gardens of Suzhou, Jiangsu Province, can date back to the 6th century BC,
when the city was founded as the capital of the Wu Kingdom.
Garden masters from each dynasty adapted various techniques to artfully simulate nature by
taking full advantage of the limited physical space available to them. Thus, gardens in Suzhou
became a microcosm of the natural world, incorporating basic elements such as water, stones,
plants and various types of buildings of literary and poetic significance.
These unique designs have had profound influence on the evolution of both Eastern and
Western garden art. Indeed they serve as an invaluable treasure chest offering us a real insight into
Chinese classical culture.
【写作指导】本篇书面表达属于应用文。要求考生应校英语周举行“讲中国故事”活动，
任择一处中国古典建筑介绍，内容包括：1. 历史；2. 艺术特色；3. 文化意义和地位。
【解析】1.词汇积累
各种各样的：various→a variety of
充分利用：take full advantage of→make the most of
意义深远的：profound→far-reaching
影响：influence→impact
2.句式拓展
简单句变复合句
原句：Indeed they serve as an invaluable treasure chest offering us a real insight into Chinese
classical culture.
拓展句：Indeed they serve as an invaluable treasure chest, which can offer us a real insight into
Chinese classical culture.
【创新表达】【高分句型1】The classical gardens of Suzhou, Jiangsu Province, can date back
to the 6th century BC, when the city was founded as the capital of the Wu Kingdom. (运用了
when引导的非限制性定语从句)
【高分句型2】Thus, gardens in Suzhou became a microcosm of the natural world, incorporating
basic elements such as water, stones, plants and various types of buildings of literary and poetic
significance. (运用了现在分词作状语)
4．Hello everyone, I’m Li Hua, the host of the Cross-Cultural Forum. Welcome to our school!
Today I’m more than honored to have Mr. Wang here to give a lecture on Chinese
calligraphy. As one of the most famous experts in Chinese calligraphy, Mr. Wang has been
committed to the study of Chinese calligraphy, creating his own research system.
Since its establishment in our school in 2012, “Cross-Cultural Forum” has always been
adhering to the purpose of building a cultural platform and promoting cultural exchange, which
has raised students’ cross-cultural awareness and cultivated their ability of cooperative learning.
Now let’s follow Mr.Wang and dive into the splendid Chinese calligraphy.
【写作指导】本篇书面表达属于应用文。假设考生是某国际学校“跨文化论坛”的主持人，
写一篇关于邀请中国书法家Mr. Wang 给学生做讲座的节目主持的开场白，内容包括表示
欢迎、专家介绍和节目介绍。
【解析】1.词汇积累
荣幸的：honored →privileged
做演讲：give a speech →deliver a lecture
致力于：committed→devoted
提升：raise →enhance
2.句式拓展
简单句变复合句
原句：As one of the most famous experts in Chinese calligraphy, Mr. Wang has been committed
to the study of Chinese calligraphy, creating his own research system.
拓展句：Mr. Wang, who is one of the most famous experts in Chinese calligraphy, has been
committed to the study of Chinese calligraphy, creating his own research system.
【创新表达】【高分句型1】As one of the most famous experts in Chinese calligraphy, Mr.
Wang has been committed to the study of Chinese calligraphy, creating his own research system.
（运用了现在分词短语作状语）
【高分句型2】Since its establishment in our school in 2012, “Cross-Cultural Forum” has always
been adhering to the purpose of building a cultural platform and promoting cultural exchange,
which has raised students’ cross-cultural awareness and cultivated their ability of cooperative
learning. （运用了which引导的非限制性定语从句）
5．Dear Jim,
I am writing to say sorry to you. I failed to reply to your email in time because I got a severecold last week and didn’t get better until yesterday. Therefore, I missed your email and didn’t give
you any advice about the Chinese Characters Competition.
Anyway, how was your performance in the competition? You must have done well, for you
are very diligent and have learned Chinese for years. I will always have your back as you will
always have mine.
Looking forward to your reply!
Yours ,
Li Hua
【写作指导】本篇书面表达属于应用文写作中的道歉信。要求考生给英国朋友 Jim写封邮
件，表达自己未能及时回复Jim邮件的歉意，并解释原因以及询问参赛情况。
【解析】1.词汇积累
因此：therefore→ thus
建议：advice→ suggestion
勤奋的：diligent→ hardworking
支持：have sb. back→ support sb.
2.句式拓展
简单句变复合句
原句：Anyway, how was your performance in the competition?
拓展句：Anyway, I wonder how your performance was in the competition.
【创新表达】【高分句型1】I failed to reply to your email in time because I got a severe cold
last week and didn’t get better until yesterday.（运用了because引导的原因状语从句）
【高分句型2】You must have done well, for you are very diligent and have learned Chinese for
years.（运用了for引导的原因状语从句）
