比赛收获类故事
写作导图
一、建立紧张氛围
写作要点：用感官描写和心理活动铺垫赛前紧张感
例句与解析：
1. Emily felt her throat tighten and her palms grow clammy as she stepped onto the stage.
（艾米丽走上舞台时感到喉咙发紧，手心冒汗。）
→ 解析：用身体反应（throat tighten/palms clammy）直接传递紧张感，适合描写人物心理。
2. The deafening silence before the race made Mike's heartbeat echo loudly in his ears.
（比赛前震耳欲聋的寂静让迈克的心跳声在耳边轰鸣。）
→ 解析：矛盾修辞（deafening silence）强化紧张氛围，比喻心跳声体现感官细节。
3. "What if I forget the lyrics?" The thought circled endlessly in her mind like a trapped bird.
（"要是忘词怎么办？"这个想法像被困住的鸟儿般在她脑海中不断盘旋。）
→ 解析：内心独白+比喻（trapped bird）展现焦虑，使读者产生共鸣。
4. As the judge's eyes scanned the competitors, Lucy's knees trembled like leaves in a storm.
（当评委扫视选手时，露西的双膝像暴风雨中的树叶般颤抖。）
→ 解析：明喻（like leaves）生动刻画肢体语言，暗示人物脆弱感。二、刻画比赛过程
写作要点：用动态动词和比喻增强场景画面感
例句与解析：
1. He surged forward like a torpedo, cutting through the water with powerful strokes.
（他像鱼雷般猛然向前，用有力的划水动作劈开波浪。）
→ 解析：比喻（torpedo）和动词（surged/cutting）结合，突显速度和力量。
2. Her fingers danced across the piano keys, weaving a melody that brought tears to the audience.
（她的手指在琴键上舞动，编织出令观众落泪的旋律。）
→ 解析：拟人化（danced/weaving）赋予音乐生命力，侧面烘托表演感染力。
3. Sweat poured down his face as he strained toward the finish line, every muscle screaming in protest.
（汗水从他脸上淌下，他奋力冲向终点线，每块肌肉都在痛苦抗议。）
→ 解析：感官细节（sweat poured）和拟人（muscles screaming）强化身体极限。
4. The ball arced through the air in a perfect parabola before swishing through the net.
（篮球在空中划出完美的抛物线，最后"唰"地穿过篮网。）
→ 解析：专业术语（parabola）和拟声词（swishing）提升场景真实感。
三、表现收获成长
写作要点：通过反思和象征物体现精神升华
例句与解析：
1. The trophy felt light in her hands compared to the heavyweight of confidence she had gained.
（奖杯在她手中显得很轻，远不及她收获的沉甸甸的自信。）
→ 解析：对比（trophy轻 vs confidence重）点明无形收获比有形奖励更重要。
2. Though they didn't win, the shared smiles on their sweat-streaked faces spoke louder than any medal.
（尽管没有获胜，但他们挂着汗水的脸上共享的笑容比任何奖牌都更有说服力。）
→ 解析：细节描写（sweat-streaked faces）暗示团队合作，传递超越输赢的主题。3. The torn sneakers in the corner weren't just shoes—they were maps of every mile she had conquered.
（角落里的破旧运动鞋不仅是鞋子，更是她征服的每一公里的地图。）
→ 解析：象征手法（sneakers as maps）将物品转化为成长见证，引发情感共鸣。
4. As the applause faded, she realized true victory wasn't about beating others, but surpassing her own
fears.
（掌声渐息时，她意识到真正的胜利不是击败他人，而是超越自己的恐惧。）
→ 解析：哲理式结尾（true victory）提升故事立意，适用于比赛类主题升华。
四、使用高级句式
写作要点：通过倒装、分词结构等增强语言表现力
例句与解析：
1. Not until the last note faded did she dare to breathe, her heart pounding like a war drum.
（直到最后一个音符消散，她才敢呼吸，心脏像战鼓般轰鸣。）
→ 解析：倒装句（Not until...）制造悬念，比喻（war drum）强化紧张余韵。
2. Exhausted yet exhilarated, he collapsed onto the track, staring at the sky painted in twilight gold.
（筋疲力尽却兴奋不已的他倒在跑道上，凝望暮色鎏金的天空。）
→ 解析：分词结构（Exhausted yet exhilarated）浓缩复杂情感，环境描写烘托心境。
3. Harder than the physical pain was the mental battle—to keep going when every cell begged to stop.
（比身体疼痛更艰难的是心理斗争——当每个细胞都在哀求停止时仍要坚持。）
→ 解析：比较级前置（Harder than）强调精神挑战，拟人（cells begged）增强感染力。
4. Soaring above the roaring crowd was a single white dove, its wings reflecting the stadium lights like
hope incarnate.
（在喧闹人群上空翱翔着一只白鸽，它的翅膀反射着体育场的灯光，如同希望的化身。）
→ 解析：倒装句（Soaring...was）营造诗意画面，象征手法（dove as hope）深化主题。
使用建议：
1. 情感递进：按照"紧张→拼搏→转折→感悟"四阶段搭建故事框架2. 细节选择：每段聚焦1-2个感官细节（如颤抖的手、汗水气味、观众呼喊声）
3. 主题呼应：在结尾通过物品（奖牌/旧鞋）或环境（日落/空旷场地）呼应开头
4. 语言升级：将简单句改写为复合句，如把"I won"扩展为"The realization that I had
outgrown my self-doubt hit me harder than any victory cheer."
背精彩句子，让表达出彩
1．As the final whistle blew, a sense of triumph flooded over me as I realized that all of our
hard work had paid off.
当终场哨声吹响时，一种胜利的感觉涌上心头，因为我意识到我们所有的辛勤工作都得到了回
报。
2．The cheers from the crowd echoed through the stadium, and I couldn't help but feel a
rush of excitement as I basked in the glory of our victory.
人群的欢呼声回荡在体育场内，当我沉浸在胜利的荣耀中时，我不禁感到一阵兴奋。
3．Despite the physical and mental exhaustion, I couldn't wipe the smile off my face as I
reflected on the incredible memories and lessons learned from the competition.
尽管身心疲惫，当我回想起了从比赛中学到的令人难以置信的回忆和教训，我还是无法抹去脸上
的笑容。
4．As we celebrated our win, I couldn't help but feel grateful for the opportunity to be part
of such an amazing team and to have pushed myself to my limits.
当我们庆祝胜利时，我不禁感到感激有机会成为这样一个了不起的团队的一员，并将自己推向极
限。
5．After months of training and hard work, I finally crossed the finish line of the marathon, my
heart bursting with pride and satisfaction.
经过几个月的训练和努力，我终于冲过了马拉松的终点线，心中充满了自豪和满足。
6．As the final whistle blew, our team erupted into cheers and high-fives, basking in the
glory of our hard-earned victory.
随着终场哨声吹响，我们的团队爆发出欢呼声和击掌声，沉浸在我们来之不易的胜利的荣耀中。
7．Despite the rain pouring down on us, the thrill of competing in the championship game
kept our spirits soaring, and we emerged triumphant in the end.尽管下着倾盆大雨，但参加冠军赛的快感让我们精神振奋，最终我们取得了胜利。
8．With beads of sweat running down my face and my heart pounding in my chest, I knew
that the grueling hours of practice had paid off as I claimed the top spot on the podium.
汗珠顺着我的脸流下来，我的心在胸腔里砰砰直跳，我知道艰苦的练习时间得到了回报，因为我
在领奖台上占据了头把交椅。
9．Even in defeat, I felt a sense of accomplishment and growth, knowing that every moment
on the field had taught me something new and valuable.
即使失败，我也感到成就感和成长感，知道球场上的每一刻都教会了我一些新的和有价值的东
西。
10.When my turn came, I mustered up courage and stepped onto the platform．
轮到我的时候，我鼓足勇气走上了讲台。
11.I spoke in a nervous voice and even stuttered a few times as I forgot parts of the story.
My legs trembled and so did my voice .
我说话声音紧张，甚至结巴了几次，因为我忘记了故事的一部分。我的腿在颤抖，我的声音也在
颤抖
12.Then, along with the first note of music, Emily began to sing her heart out. Her voice was
like a nightingale ringing in the auditorium.
接着，随着音乐的第一个音符，爱米丽开始放声歌唱。她的声音像夜莺在礼堂里鸣叫。
13.So dynamic was he that he swam swifter than ever．With his arm waving, he cut
through the water smoothly like a flying fish.
他活力四射，游得比以前更快了。他挥动着手臂，像飞鱼一样平稳地划水。
14.It takes me a while to notice the roar of the audience’s cheers thundering all around the
landscape.
过了一段时间，我才注意到观众的欢呼声响彻了整个舞台。
15.After I finished, the audience burst into thunderous applause. 我说完后，全场爆发出雷鸣般的
掌声。
16.Upon finishing the talk, I trotted towards Mareya and gave her a bear hug. Meanwhile,
thunderous applause rang through the classroom.
演讲结束后，我快步走向玛瑞娅，给了她一个大大的拥抱。与此同时，教室里响起了雷鸣般的掌
声。17. When the curtain opened up, the eyes of the whole audience fell upon Emily. "Emily
White!" Someone whispered .幕布拉开时，所有观众的目光都落在了埃米莉身上。“艾米丽白!”有人
小声说。
18.One woman got up and began to animatedly dance about the room. Some of the people swayed in
their chairs to the beat of the music while others tapped theirs toes. The performance ended up with a
storm of applause from the crowd.
一个女人站了起来，开始在房间里活跃地跳舞。有些人随着音乐的节拍在椅子上摇摆，而另一些
人则用脚尖敲击。 演出在 观众暴风雨般的掌声中结束 。
18. No cheers filled the air when I finished my show. The end of our run was met with surprised
silence. \
当我结束我的节目时，没有欢呼声。我们的表演遭遇到了令人不可思议的沉默。
19. I could feel that all the eyes were fixed on us. A strong sense of nervousness surged
through me.
我能感觉到所有的眼睛都盯着我们。一种强烈的紧张感涌上我的全身。
20.Then the next few minutes witnessed fierce competition between other groups.
接下来的几分钟里，其他组之间展开了激烈的竞争。
21. Standing in front of the line, Emily felt her throat tight and her palms sweating.
站在队伍前面，埃米莉感到喉咙发紧，手心冒汗。
22.With that and all the high fives and the cheers of the day, the best prize that I walked
away with was my confidence.
有了这些 和 今天所有的击掌和欢呼 ，我带走的最好的奖品就是我的信心。
23.With heart pounding quickly, Mike was nervous that his legs and arms began to lose power.
随着心跳的加快，迈克很紧张，他的腿和胳膊开始失去力量。
24.Then they were all clapping, yelping their praises, telling me how proud I'd made them all.
然后他们都鼓掌，大声赞扬，告诉我我让他们感到多么自豪。
25.It is not the lucky charm brought by ice-cream but his own diligence, persistence and
confidence that contributes to his success in swim meet.
不是冰激凌带来的幸运魅力，而是他自己的勤奋、坚持和信心，使他在游泳比赛中获得成功。高考真题演练
2022年6月新高考卷（身残志坚的男孩）
It was the day of the big cross-country run. Students from seven different primary schools in and around the
small town were warming up and walking the route(路线)through thick evergreen forest.
I looked around and finally spotted David, who was standing by himself off to the side by a fence. He was
small for ten years old. His usual big toothy smile was absent today. I walked over and asked him why he wasn’t
with the other children. He hesitated and then said he had decided not to run.
What was wrong? He had worked so hard for this event!
I quickly searched the crowd for the school’s coach and asked him what had happened. “I was afraid that kids
from other schools would laugh at him,” he explained uncomfortably. “I gave him the choice to run or not, and let
him decide.”
I bit back my frustration(懊恼). I knew the coach meant well—he thought he was doing the right thing. After
making sure that David could run if he wanted, I turned to find him coming towards me, his small body rocking
from side to side as he swung his feet forward.
David had a brain disease which prevented him from walking or running like other children, but at school his
classmates thought of him as a regular kid. He always participated to the best of his ability in whatever they were
doing. That was why none of the children thought it unusual that David had decided to join the cross-country team.
It just took him longer—that’s all. David had not missed a single practice, and although he always finished his run
long after the other children, he did always finish. As a special education teacher at the school, I was familiar with
the challenges David faced and was proud of his strong determination.
注意：
1. 续写词数应为150左右;
2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答.
We sat down next to each other, but David wouldn’t look at me.
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I watched as David moved up to the starting line with the other runners.
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【参考范文】We sat down next to each other, but David wouldn’t look at me. I said gently and quietly, “No one can
change your mind, except yourself. If you desire to challenge yourself, there is nothing to do with others’
thoughts.” He sat still with a deep breath. “You have a full preparation before this event, which is the most
important reason why you show up here”, I added with a sincere tone. Hearing my words, David turned to me
tremblingly with tears spilling out of his eyes and expressed he had made a firm determination to finish the cross-
country run. His coach heard what David said and gave me a look—the kind that was more determined than anyone
else’s.
I watched as David moved up to the starting line with the other runners. The race started. It seemed that
the runway was extremely long for young children, not to mention a child with a heart disease. David insisted on
running as if he had forgotten all his weaknesses, though he was tripped over within the a few kilometers. It didn’t
take long before he picked himself up again and continued his mission. Classmates all appeared on the racing track,
cheering for him. “Come on! You can make it! We are proud of you!” they shouted enthusiastically. To everyone’s
joy, he reached the final line and ranked the 20th. It was no more important whether he won the first place or not. It
was his brave heart and strong faith that could make something unusual happen finally.
模拟演练
01
阅读下面短文，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
I had always prided myself on my sharp tongue and brilliant response whether in class debates or casual
arguments. Thus, when I was selected to represent the school in the national debate series, I was naturally
extremely confident of myself.
All the members in my team were good speakers. We had an experienced teacher who trained us well.
But I was undoubtedly the most outstanding speaker. In each of the rounds that I debated in, all the judges
selected me as the best one. This meant that my confidence was the highest by the time we found ourselves
with one week to train before the finals. I had every reason to believe that I would be voted the best speaker
for the debate series.
I began to be self-important about the whole business and started behaving that way with my team-mates.I would laugh at Eton’s poor debating style. I would complain of Vivian’s slow response. I saw myself as the
natural debater who would be disappointed by their bad performance.
As the finals drew near, I became more and more dissatisfied with my team. I began missing practices.
My teacher was worried. My teammates were panicked. However, they had no choice but to rely on me to win
the finals. Even if they would love to remove me from the team they could not because there was no
replacement good enough.
The day of the finals finally came. I was very excited that I was able to finally show off my debating
skills. Everyone was expecting my performance.They knew that I was praised to be the one most likely to win
the best speaker for the debate series.
注意：
1．续写词数应为150左右；
2．请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
Paragraph1:
But the reality was not something that I had ever imagined.
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Paragraph 2:
Suddenly,a comforting hand from behind held mine.
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02
How exciting! Today is my basketball Grand-final! My team of six enthusiastic boys led by our coach,
Jack, has worked extremely hard just to make the finals. My heart was pounding a hundred kilometres an hour
as I walked into our home ground. As I hurried to our team bench, our opponents caught my attention. They
seemed a lot taller and “meaner” looking.
Whistle blew. Five of us started on the court. Our opponent got hold of the ball first. They were
unbelievably fast. They kept breaking our defences and kept scoring goals. Excited parents were cheering so
much that their faces were as red as beetroots. Even our best, Bryce, could not stop our opponents fromscoring, which annoyed him a lot. By half time, both teams were extremely exhausted and our opponents were
ten goals ahead, which presented us with an enormous but achievable challenge.
Jack was awfully anxious as we were not playing anywhere near our best. He told us that we could still
win if we made our transitions much quicker so that penalty shots came our way.He also directed us to
rebound (抢断篮板) and position ourselves better to receive and score goals. Most important, he reminded us
to play as a team.
Our team was all fired up. The second half started in our favour. We were as quick as lightning on the
court. We were dribbling (运球), passing, shooting and rebounding without any mistakes. We caught our
opponents by surprise. The scores were almost level. We were trailing only by one point. The crowd was
growing wild with excitement, fuelling our confidence. At the same time, our opponents switched back to
attention and started playing like what they did in the first half, making it harder for us to score.
One minute left! Our opponent threw in the ball but I managed to steal it! Our team was bursting with
happiness! More opponents were heading my way and I had to pass the ball to Bryce. Instead of passing on
the ball, he did the most unexpected thing. He tried to score from half court! He missed by miles!
注意:
1．续写词数应为150左右；
2．请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Then I noticed Jack signaled to the referee for a pause.
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Whistle blew again and we came back to the court.
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03
Jenny is a fifth - grader. She is one of the most popular girls in her class because she is among the
brightest in her class . She can do the most cartwheels (侧手翻) in a row , but most of all , she has the talent to
dance well .
Last year, she entered the school’s dance competition and won first place. Since that day, she has been theclass attraction. This year, the school is holding another dance competition, but there has been a change. The
competition has to be done in pairs.
Jenny’s class was expecting her to win again this year. But Jenny was unsure. She wanted to enter the
competition, but she had never danced with a partner before. She decided to ask some of the boys in her class
to enter with her. They all said no because they did not know how to dance .
She finally decided to turn to one of her closest friends, Carl. Carl was unwilling to join at first because
he also didn’t know how to dance. But Jenny insisted and he finally agreed. However, she was still worried
because she knew it was going to be more of a challenge because Carl was not a good dancer. The competition
was in two months , and only time could tell whether they would win or not.
Jenny and Carl spent the first two weeks memorizing the steps of their dance with the help of their
teacher. Carl was pretty clumsy at first . Jenny had to devote some time to helping Carl improve his skill.
Fortunately, he finally got the hang of it. They spent the rest of the time perfecting their moves. The day of the
competition was near . Jenny and Carl were beginning to get nervous.
注意:1.续写词数应为150左右;
2．请按如下格式在相应位置作答。
The day of the competition arrived.
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They came to a perfect start.
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04
In old times, there was a story about a young athletic boy hungry for success, for whom winning was
everything.
One day, the boy was preparing himself for a running competition in his small native village. He and two
other young boys were to compete. A large crowd had gathered to witness the competition and a wise old man,
upon hearing of the little boy, had traveled far to see it too.
The race started. The boy showed his determination, strength and power and he was first. The crowdcheered and waved at the boy. The wise man remained still and calm. The little boy, however, felt proud and
important.
A second race was called, and two new young challengers came forward to run with the little boy. The
little boy finished first once again. The crowd again cheered and waved at the boy. The wise man expressed no
opinion. The little boy, however, felt proud and important.
“Another race, another race!” shouted the little boy. The wise old man stepped forward and presented the
little boy with two new challengers, a frail old lady and a blind man. “What is this?” asked the little boy.
“Race!” said the wise man. The race was started and the boy was the only finisher. The little boy raised his
arms in delight. The crowd, however, was silent showing no happiness. “What has happened? Why don’t they
join in my success?” he asked the wise old man. “Race again, ” replied the wise man. “This time, all three of
you, finish together,” continued the wise man.
注意:1、所续写短文的词数应为 150 左右；
2、续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；
Paragraph1:
The little boy thought a little,
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Paragraph2:
“Old man, I don’t understand! Who are the crowd cheering for? Which one of us?” asked the little boy.
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05
“Number 7, Jobie Nymble, takes the lead,” cried the announcer. “Just one more hurdle (跨栏) and-Jobie
Nymble from Riverside Middle School takes first place in the girls’ 100-meter hurdles！”
“County championships, here we come.” yelled Jobie, patting (轻拍) her worn green track spikes (钉鞋).
They were her lucky shoes and she loved them. “Next Saturday, we’re taking the gold home,” Jobie whispered
to her spikes.
“Don’t forget, guys.” said Marisol, one of her teammates. “My birthday party is next Friday at Hidden
Park. You should all come.”
The day of Marisol’s party came. Jobie put on her favorite clothes: her blue shorts, an old track T-shirt,and her lucky spikes. The party had begun when Jobie arrived at Hidden Park. She stopped by the track first,
planning to do some running exercise. Even at that end of the park, music and the smell of grilled food filled
the air.
Two of Jobie’s teammates rushed toward her, breathless and barefoot. “Come on,” they shouted. “You
have to try the slide.” Jobie’s eyes shot toward the party area. “Slide? What sli ...?”
Suddenly, she saw it. The BIGGEST inflatable (充气的 ) slide she had ever seen was on the far side of
the park. Smiling kids zoomed down the slide at unspeakable speeds.
Without thinking twice, Jobie threw off her spikes and ran fast toward the slide. Its ladder rose to the sky,
but she reached the top in no time. She slid down, sped to the edge, and closed her eyes as she let go. Jobie
couldn’t get enough fun from the slide.
When it was finally time to go home, she unwillingly made her way back to the track where she’d left her
shoes. As she eyed the area from a distance, panic set in. Jobie picked up the pace, her heart pounding louder
the closer she got. When she reached the place she’d left them. her heart stopped.
“They’re gone!” she screamed. “My lucky spikes are gone.” Jobie’s teammates helped her search the
park. No lucky spikes. “So long, gold,” Jobie groaned (叹息).
注意：
1，续写词数应为150左右；
2，请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Paragraph 1:
The next day, the best track teams in the county gathered at Hidden Park for the championships.
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Paragraph 2：
Buhhhhh (比赛的信号声) went the starting signal.
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