ARTICLE · 1278446
初中英语主题作文到底要怎么写?

Alex

His name is Yuan Longping, his job is a great scientist, he was born in 1930. He grew a new kind of rice. He worked in the fields of his life. He wanted to feed the world with his rice.


Hello everyone! I'm in the art club. We usually meet every Friday afternoon in the art room. We do many fun things, like paper-cutting and drawing. We also share our artworks in the club.
My club life is wonderful because I find great joy there. I can make things by myself. It is great to see an idea in my mind turn into a beautiful artwork.
I really love my club.

范文就是很规矩地把三个问题按照顺序回答了一遍,其中第一个问题略写,后两个问题重点展开。
这样的好处是它的结构就非常地清晰,而且内容也很贴合它“艺术社团”的主题,不考虑书写,我至少会给16+。
但很明显,范文内容大都是课外表达,很考验学生自己的语言组织能力和表达能力。那能不能像我说的一样,尽量用上我们学过的背过的内容呢?
让我欣慰的是,我的这几个学生交出了亮眼的答卷。

周同学的这一篇,结构很清晰,写明社团名称、社团活动和个人感受,全篇多处用到课文和同步练习里背诵的佳句。虽然还是以短句为主,但已经有意识做拓展。
修正后内容如下(只修正语法错误,不改动原文):

Hello everyone! I'm in the reading club. I enjoy reading books. Reading books opens my eyes. I go to the reading club on Sunday. I read books and learn in the club. After reading, I share the stories I read with my friends. My friends love them too.
There is so much joy in reading. Reading books can bring fun and knowledge. I think my club life is very good.
I really love my club.

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同样是写读书社团,吴同学的这一篇作文行文流畅自然,结构、内容都很不错,且全篇没有语法错误这一点,在考试作文里是具有很大优势的。我给她留言,现在的字体限制了高分,是因为我一开始想给她打更高的分数。后来斟酌了一番,还是稍微压了一下分,毕竟本来就有“卷面印象分”嘛。

修正后内容如下(只修正语法错误,不改动原文):

Hello everyone! I'm in the reading club. We read different books and share our ideas every Friday afternoon. I really enjoy the time here. It helps me learn new knowledge and make nice friends. It makes my busy school life interesting and fun.
I really love my club.

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曹同学的这一篇作文有灵活引用出现在我们大情景单选里的句子,第三问的感悟写得比较详实,很多句子也多是化用我们背过的课文原句。现在的这篇作文里美中不足的是第二问没有展开多写几点。
btw,曹同学平时学英语就很扎实,背书默写非常积极,书写也很漂亮,感觉她的作文以后会经常在我的分享里“出镜”。

修正后内容如下(只修正语法错误,不改动原文):

Hello everyone! I'm in the drawing club at school. Every day, I draw with my schoolmates in the club. I enjoy the quiet time.
I think my club is very good and interesting. Because it brings me so much fun. It helps me make many friends, too. I'm so lucky to join the drawing club. I hope to draw with my friends in the coming years!
I really love my club.

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潘同学的这篇作文内容是最饱满的,把在社团里的活动、对社团生活的评价都详写得很精彩,也基本没有语法错误,可以看得出本人英语基础很好,也会把课文里学到的内容灵活运用到自己的作文里(观鸟社团是我们课本里的)。我课上随口提过可以适当引用谚语,他也记在了心里,用上了。可惜字迹拖了后腿,如果书写再工整美观一些,18+作文不是梦呀。

修正后内容如下(只修正语法错误,不改动原文):

Hello everyone! I'm in the bird-watching club. In the morning, I often go to the park and watch birds. I see many birds. I often take part in different activities in the club like watching birds, drawing about birds.
I feel happy and excited because I can see all kinds of birds in the club's books.
As a saying goes, no pain, no gain. I learn more about birds. And my hobby brings me fun and knowledge. I'm so lucky to enjoy my hobby in my club!
I really love my club.

说实话,这几篇作文放到中考英语的标准里看,那还是稚嫩得很,但它们的可贵之处在于,他们把背过的句子,迁移到新的写作场景里。
所以,初一阶段,不要什么都想“原创”,先做到条理清晰地表达、灵活用好课内积累,就是作文提分最稳的路径。
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