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考点 40 读后续写 05 对
话模式突破（原卷版）
【命题解读】
“对话”何时用？如何写？写多少？写哪里？看完本节的讲解，会有一个比较明晰的
答案。
【思维导图】
“对话”注意事项1）对话描写必须为推动故事情节服务，是情节发展的一个环节，每段出现一两句即可；
2）对话描写必须反映人物的心理与情感，刻画人物的性格；
3）对话描写不宜过长，侧重口语化词汇，避开生僻词汇；
4）对话描写要尽可能结合动作描写，明确对谁说，具有画面感；
5）对话描写中要学会使用几个感叹词，表示说话人的喜、怒、哀、乐等情绪；
对话标签的三个位置
她说，“我想和你一起去，但我还没有完成家庭作业。”这句话用英语，从句式结构的角
度来看，怎么表达呢？特别是对话标签she said的位置变化。
【 1 . 对话标签在前】
She said,“I would like to go with you, but I haven’t finished my homework.”
【 2 . 对话标签在后】
“I would like to go with you, but I haven’t finished my homework.”She said.
这两句是最常见的形式，大家写出来，应该问题不大。我们来看第三种形式。
【 3 . 对话标签在句子中间】
“I would like to go with you,”she said, “but I haven’t finished my homework.”
注意：对话标签在后或者在句子中间时（第2,3种情况），如果主语是名词，则可以倒装。
而代词不可以倒装，said she是错误的。
“I would like to go with you, but I haven’t finished my homework.”said Emily（或者 Emily
said.）
“I would like to go with you,”said Emily/ Emily said, “but I haven’t finished my homework.”对话 " 四大误区 "
1 . 废话连篇，对情节发展和刻画人物性格没有帮助。
“Hey, how are you?” “I’m fine, how are you?”
“How is the weather?” “Terrific! Nice day for a walk, isn’t it?”
这样的对话在现实生活中很真实，但是小说毕竟是艺术加工，无助情节推动的，不能刻画
人物性格的日常寒暄和偏离文章主线的对话绝对不用。
【 2 . 追求花哨，过度使用对话标签】
“That is fantastic news,” he said happily.
此句中完全没有必要加上一个happily来表达说的方式，因为句中的fantastic一词足以说明
说话人了表情，过度强调 会让读者的注意力集中在“说话的方式”而不是“说话的内
容”。
建议改为：“That is fantastic news！” he said/screamed/exclaimed. 一个感叹号和一个
fantastic已经足以让读者想象当时的情景。适当的“艺术留白”也是需要的，这样会留给
读者想象的空间。
还有一种避免过度的dialogue tags的方法是运用“动作描写”，尤其是表情上动作来取而
代之。
如：Her eyes reflected the candlelight as she smiled at her son. “Everyone is unique. Just follow
your heart and be yourself!”当她对儿子微笑时，她的眼睛反射着烛光。 “每个人都是独一无
二的。 只要跟随你的心，做你自己！”
【 3 用词不当，错误使用对话标签】
"I can't believe it," Emma gasped. (gasp意思为“喘气”)
"That's funny," Henry chuckled. (chuckled.意思为“轻笑”)
评析：以上两句话也是在大量的学生习作中发现的。这里把动作描写和动作标签 混淆了，
试想谁能gasp（喘息）、chuckle（轻笑）出一句话？除非他或她有特异功能。纠正方法如下：
"I can't believe it," Emma said with a gasp.
（对话标签Emma said+ with介词短语）
Emma gasped. "I can't believe it."
（动作描写+句号）
"I can't believe it." Emma gasped.
（对话句+动作描写,注意对话句式句号）
"That's funny!" Henry chuckled.
（感叹句结束+动作描写）
"That's funny," Henry said, chuckling.
（Question tag+ 分词做伴随状况）
请特别关注以上对话的标点符号。
【 4 对话标签多此一举：对话对象十分明确，仍使用对话标签】
“I told you already,” I said, glaring.
评析：此句貌似豪华，其实对话中的主语“I”已经清晰地说明了说话者，完全没有必要用
对话标签“I said” 来说明说话对象。纠正方法：加上一点动作描写就可以避免这种错误，
并且提升语言的生动性。
I glared at him. “I told you already.”
让你的对话标签不平庸四个小技巧
在对话标签中加入语气，嗓音，情感让你的描写更生动传神。
【①第一种：加语气】
“I would love to,” said Emily in a pleasant tone. “我很乐意这样做，”艾米丽用一种愉快的语
气说。
这里用到了“in a pleasant tone. ”，即“用一种愉快的语气”，基本结构为：in a/an+形容词
+tone如： in a pleasant愉悦的/firm坚定的/rude粗鲁的/sad悲伤的 tone
也可以用 in a tone of +名词的搭配
如：in a tone of surprise用一种惊讶的语气
in a tone of curiosity用一种好奇的语气
in a tone of impatience用一种不耐烦的语气
in a tone of command用一种命令的语气
【② 第二种：加嗓音】
“I didn’t mean to,” she murmured in a low voice. “我不是故意的，”她低声说。
这里用到了“ in a low voice”，即“小声地说道”或者“用一种...声音”，基本结构是：
in a/an+形容词+voice
如： in a high /low / sweet/loud/soft /weak voice 用一个高/低/甜/响亮/软/弱的声音
【③第三种：加情感】
“I...I.. don’t think I’m right for the part,”I replied with embarrassment.“我...我..认为我不适合这个
角色，”我尴尬地回答。
这里用到了“ with embarrassment”，即“（伴随着）难堪”，基本结构是： with +情感
名词。如with excitement （伴随着）激动。
【④加副词】
“我再也不会那样做了，”我回答。如何丰富这句话里的对话标签呢？
“I will never do that again,” I answered firmly. 加上了副词firmly（坚定地）
这句话也可以这么写：可将副词提到句首。
Firmly，I answered，“I will never do that again.”
【模拟题 1】（2022·重庆市育才中学一模）
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
Chris Dykstra hadn’t expected what began as a casual walk around the neighborhood with thefamily one night led to a journey of friendship.
Chris Dykstra, a traffic manager in Shorewood, Illinois had noticed a few raccoons (浣熊)
wandering around his garbage. However, he didn’t think too much of it. One night when his wife
Julie was taking their four children for a walk after dinner, they tracked the raccoons back to their
neighbor’s roof. A further investigation showed that the raccoons had chewed a hole in the
neighbor’s roof and were living in her attic (阁楼).
The couple had lived in their current home for five years. Yet they had very little contact with
the neighbor. They knew her first name was Dorene and that she liked to watch their children play
in the backyard, and that’s about it.
Concerned for their neighbor’s well-being, Julie decided to knock on the door to make their
neighbor aware of the raccoons living in the attic. Julie knocked on the door and rang the doorbell,
but no one answered. She decided to ask the local police department to do a wellness check on
their neighbor.
Two police officers and an animal control officer visited the neighbor’s home to conduct a
wellness check. This time the neighbor — Miss Dorene Shock — opened the door. Miss Shock
was surprised to see someone check in on her. The officers made her aware of the raccoons in her
attic.
Having been told the whole thing, Miss Shock welcomed Julie into her house. After touring
the house, Julie learned that Miss Shock lived a poor life. Her home barely had any furniture, and
she even didn’t have a TV set. Besides, her house was in need of additional repairs and updates
including new light bulbs.
注意：1. 续写词数应为150左右；
2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Chris and his wife knew this was an opportunity to help a neighbor in need.
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Several days later, Chris and his wife came across Miss Shock and had a chat with her.
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【模拟题 2】（2022·全国·重庆南开中学模拟预测）
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
It was six o’clock when Breanna heard her mother’s phone receive a text message as it’s at on
the kitchen bench. “Mum, I bet it’s Dad!” Breanna said and jumped up from the sofa, books
spilling out in front of her. She had been deciding which story her dad would read in one of his
funny voices for the night. Breanna’s mum rubbed her temples (太阳穴) and sighed softly.
“Honey, would you mind seeing if that’s Daddy? I’ve got a bad headache but I want to start
cooking a lovely meal for us to enjoy tonight.”
“Sure, mum,” Breanna skipped into the kitchen to check the phone. Her dad had been away
for two whole nights working on a malfunction (故障) at his company’s warehouse that was at
risk of theft. Breanna felt sure he’d been able to act like a superhero and save the day — but did it
have to take so long? She picked up the phone and read the message, “Just leaving now — can’t
wait to see you both.” Breanna confirmed excitedly, “It’s from Daddy! He’s on his way home!”
Her mother managed a weak smile as her daughter clapped her hands with joy. It had been
four months since she’d lost her job and with only one income to support the family. Her husband
had taken on as many shifts and extra duties as he could to make ends meet. Times were tough and
he was working long hours, but it made the time Breanna spent with her daddy even more special.
“Oh, that’s wonderful news. Now let’s see what I can find to eat,” her mother rose painfully from
the sofa and added.
注意：
1. 续写词数应为150左右；
2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
“Great! Mum’s got a bad headache but I’m going to help her cook dinner. See you soon!”
Breanna sent her dad a quick reply.
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Another message from her father drew Breanna’s attention.
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【模拟题 3】（2022·湖南·一模）
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写
的词数应为150左右。
When a tornado hit a small town nearby, many families were left homeless. Afterward, all the
local newspapers carried stories of the families who suffered the hardest to appeal to people’s
attention and assistance.
One Sunday, a particular picture especially touched me. A young woman stood in front of a
mobile home, a depressed expression on her face. A young boy, seven or eight years old. stood at
her side, eyes downcast. Hiding behind her skirt was a tiny girl who stared into the camera, wide
eyes with confusion and fear. The article below gave clothing sizes closely matched ours. This
would be a good opportunity to teach my seven-year-old twins. Brad and Brett, and three-year-old
Meghan to help those less fortunate than themselves.
“We have so much. And these poor people now have nothing” I said. “We’ll share what we
have with them,” I brought three large boxes down from the room upstairs and placed them in the
living room. Meghan watched seriously, as the boys and I filled one of the boxes with canned
goods and foods. While I sorted through our clothes, I encouraged the boys to go through their
toys and donate some of their less favorite things. The boys were pleased to join. Brad rose and
went to his room fast. He came back bringing his action figures that he played with not so
frequently. Brett also jumped up and ran to fetch some of his Matchbox cars and airplane models.
Meghan watched quietly as the boys piled up abandoned toys.
The boys placed the objects they had chosen to donate into one of the boxes while I filled the
third box with clothes. Meghan walked up with Lucy, her worn, faded, best-loved rag doll hugged
tightly to her chest. “I’ll help you find something for the little girl, too.” I said to the little Meghan.
Para. 1:
“Mommy, I will give Lucy to them,” Meghan turned to me.
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Para. 2:
Recognizing what little Meghan’s gesture meant, I removed my old jacket from the box of
clothes.
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【模拟题 4】（2022·江苏·模拟预测）
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
For weeks, the troop had been busy preparing for its Parents’ Night program. Everything was
in order. The walls were filled with displays, the scouts (童子军) were all enthusiastic. The tables
were covered with good things to eat.
Now it was time for Jimmie Davis to give his speech. This was the moment he had been
looking forward to for several weeks. As he arose, he caught a glimpse of his mother’s bright face
and his father's calm, confident expression. Jimmie held his head high as he started his speech, his
words bursting with pride and enthusiasm. He made sure the speech was lively and moving,
conscious that his listeners were showing high praise to him by their careful attention.
Then something happened. The world seemed to move slowly from side to side before him.
He felt his mind went blank and forgot what to say next. He slowed down, faltered (结巴), and
finally stopped. His face turned red, and his hands sought each other wildly. In desperation, he
looked toward his scout leader, begging for his help.
Having heard that boyish but great speech practiced again and again, the boy’s scout leader
supplied the missing words that allowed Jimmie to continue. But somehow it was different now.
The wonderful speech had been messed up.
Jimmie paused again, and once again the scout leader helped him. For the remaining two
minutes, the speech seemed more like the scout leader’s than Jimmie’s.
After what seemed like ages, the speech was finally over. In the heart of Jimmie, who sat
down knowing that he had failed, there was a great weight pressing down on him. Disappointment
was clearly written on the face of his mother. A twitch (抽搐) of the father's face showed howpainful he felt.
The audience applauded in a perfunctory (敷衍的) way, feeling sorry for the boy who they
thought had failed.
But the scout leader was on his feet. His eyes twinkled. All the audience listened carefully.
注意：1. 续写词数应为150左右；
2. 请按如下格式在答题卡上的相应位置作答。
Paragraph 1:
The calm, sure voice of the scout leader echoed (回响) around the hall.
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Paragraph 2:
Jimmie began to speak in a trembling but firm voice.
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【模拟题 5】（2022·江苏·南京市第一中学一模）
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
Henry got on his bike and began to deliver copies of the March 8,1970,issue of The Gazette.
Half an hour later,he threw the last newspaper onto the porch（门廊）at 35 Oak Street and cycled
to The Gazette offices. There must be something important for the editor in chief to meet with an
11-year-old paperboy.
"No good way to deliver bad news,"Mr. Trotta greeted him when Henry stepped in.Henry's
smile faded.
"We're closing shop,Henry. Advertising is down.Television is how people get their news
today. Local papers are the first to close."Mr.Trotta shrugged.
Henry couldn’t believe his ears, frozen to the spot.He thought of all hose people he had met
on his route. They wouldn't get their neighborhood news anymore!
You were great,Henry—always dependable"Mr. Trotta said.Henry forced his head up to say
good-bye.As he rode past the houses he knew so well he saw Mr.Grady on his porch,holding a broom
（扫帚）. Henry led him to a chair and cleaned the porch.They sat for a while as Mr.Grady
recalled how happy he'd been moving his family to 10 Oak. He sounded lonely.
A week after his last deliveries, Henry wondered if his customers missed The Gazette as
much as he did. He thought of a way to find out. He started out on his old route with a notebook
Henry stopped at Mrs.Burke's. She opened the door, holding the two babies.She asked him if
he knew any neighbors with experience of looking after children.
Mr. Simon was next door, carrying his violin out."Hey, Henry. My band is having à concert in
the park this Friday. Tell all your friends."
As Henry made more notes, an idea started forming in his head. Maybe he could create a
newsy page（小报）for the neighbors.
注意∶
1. 续写词数应为 150 左右;
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Neighbors cheered Henry's idea,ready to offer information.
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Henry's first Oak Street News then produced desired effects.
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【模拟题 6】（2022·广东·汕头市聿怀中学模拟预测）
阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。
On a bright, warm July afternoon, Mac Hollan, a primary school teacher, was cycling from
his home to Alaska with his friends. One of his friends had stopped to make a bicycle repair, but
they had encouraged Mac to carry on, and they would catch up with him soon. As Mac pedaled
(骑行) along alone, he thought fondly of his wife and two young daughters at home. He hoped to
show them this beautiful place someday.
Then Mac heard quick and loud breathing behind him. “Man, that's a big dog!” he thought.But when he looked to the side, he saw instantly that it wasn’t a dog at all, but a wolf, quickly
catching up with him.
Mac’s heart jumped. He found out his can of hear spray. With one hand on the bars, he fired
the spray at the wolf. A bright red cloud enveloped the animal, and to Mac's relief, it fell back,
shaking its head. But a minute later, it was by his side again. Then it attacked the back of Mac's
bike, tearing open his tent bag. He fired at the wolf a second time, and again, it fell back only to
quickly restart the chase (追赶).
Mac was pedaling hard now. He waved and yelled at passing cars but was careful not to slow
down. He saw a steep uphill climb before him. He knew that once he hit the hill, he’d be easy
caught up and the wolf’s teeth would be tearing into his flesh.
At this moment, Paul and Becky were driving their car on their way to Alaska. They didn’t
think much of it when they saw two cyclists repairing their bike on the side of the road. A bit later,
they spotted what they, too, assumed was a dog running alongside a man on a bike. As they got
closer, they realized that the dog was a wolf. Mac heard a large vehicle behind him. He pulled in
front of it as the wolf was catching up fast, just a dozen yards away now.
注意:
1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右；
2. 续写部分分为两段，每段的开头已为你写好；
Paragraph 1:
The car abruptly stopped in front of him.
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Paragraph 2:
A few minutes later, the other two cyclists arrived.
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