202505 浙江六校联考
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的
短文。
Evan, the brightest kid
in the neighbourhood
(同位语，人物刻画), ran a backyard
detective agency, where he helped neighbors solve mysteries(交代背景信息，地点，事务).
One
chilly
November morning
, his neighbor James burst into Evan's clubhouse,
with
pajamas
on
, hair stuck up, and boots muddy(独立主格). “Molly’s gone!” James
cried, burying his head in his arms(人物动作描写，现在分词做伴随动作). “Someone must have stolen
her.”
Evan patted James on the back, “Calm down, James. There might be another
explanation.” James looked up, eyes glistening with hope(独立主格刻画神态). “Do you think
you can find her?” Evan picked up a pencil and his notebook, “I need a complete
description.”
Molly was James's beloved pet turtle - olive green with black lines, a pale
yellow neck, and a six-inch shell(名词描述乌龟的特征，有没有想到咱们二联的狗狗？). She had appeared in
James's lily pond the previous spring and loved basking on a sunlit rock. But that
morning, she was nowhere to be found.
Evan's pencil danced across the paper(无灵主语句). “Let's go to the pond. Show me
where Molly was before she disappeared.” With a knitted brow(刻画人物神态), James led
the way to the backyard. “I check on her every morning.” Jame sobbed. “She likes
our lily pond, and she always likes to sit on that rock in the sun, stretching out her
neck(现在分词做伴随动作).”
Evan jotted down more notes. “Was she on the rock the last time you saw her?”
“Yes, she's there every morning at sunrise. But not today.” He added this information
to his notebook. “I've found some good clues,” he said, without looking up. “I need
to check some facts online. Meet me in my office in 30 minutes.”
Rushing
home
(现在分词做伴随动作), Evan called out to his mom, asking(现在分词做伴随动作) if he
could borrow her laptop. He searched for turtle species in Northern California.
Soon, he found matching photographs on a wildlife website. Staring
at those
photos of hibernating
( 冬眠的
) turtles
(现在分词做伴随动作), Evan was lost in deep thought.
James showed up early,“Did you find Molly?”
注意:(1)续写词数应为150 左右;(2)请按如下格式在题卡的相应位置作答。
Paragraph 1: “Not exactly,” said Evan, “but I know where she is.”
Paragraph 2: One warm April morning, he rushed to Evan's clubhouse, breathless.
202505 浙江六校联考
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
Evan, the brightest kid in the neighbourhood, ran a backyard detective agency,
where he helped neighbors solve mysteries.
One chilly November morning, his neighbor James burst into Evan's clubhouse,
with pajamas on, hair stuck up, and boots muddy. “Molly’s gone!” James cried,
burying his head in his arms. “Someone must have stolen her.”
Evan patted James on the back, “Calm down, James. There might be another
explanation.” James looked up, eyes glistening with hope. “Do you think you can find
her?” Evan picked up a pencil and his notebook, “I need a complete description.”
Molly was James's beloved pet turtle - olive green with black lines, a pale yellow
neck, and a six-inch shell. She had appeared in James's lily pond the previous spring
and loved basking (西太阳) on a sunlit rock. But that morning, she was nowhere to be
found.
Evan's pencil danced across the paper. “Let's go to the pond. Show me where
Molly was before she disappeared.” With a knitted brow, James led the way to the
backyard. “I check on her every morning.” Jame sobbed. “She likes our lily pond, and
she always likes to sit on that rock in the sun, stretching out her neck.”
Evan jotted down more notes. “Was she on the rock the last time you saw her?”
“Yes, she's there every morning at sunrise. But not today.” He added this information
to his notebook. “I've found some good clues,” he said, without looking up. “I need to
check some facts online. Meet me in my office in 30 minutes.”
Rushing home, Evan called out to his mom, asking if he could borrow her laptop.
He searched for turtle species in Northern California. Soon, he found matching
photographs on a wildlife website. Staring at those photos of hibernating (冬眠的)
turtles, Evan was lost in deep thought.
James showed up early,“Did you find Molly?”
注意:(1)续写词数应为150 左右;(2)请按如下格式在题卡的相应位置作答。
Paragraph 1: “Not exactly,” said Evan, “but I know where she is.”
Paragraph 2: One warm April morning, he rushed to Evan's clubhouse, breathless.
一、读后续写整体分析与教学设计
分析维度
内容说明
类型分类
悬疑解谜类 + 动物题材 + 日常生活类续写。
构思思路
主线是找寻宠物龟Molly。原文埋下冬眠伏笔，续写应围绕“误
以为丢失——查明冬眠事实——重逢”的故事逻辑展开。
结构布局建议
第一段（段首句：“Not exactly,” said Evan, “but I know where she
is.”）：承接Evan 的研究，解释Molly 并未失踪，而是进入了冬
眠状态，结合自然科学知识和细节回顾，引导James 逐渐接受并
理解这一事实。
第二段（段首句：One warm April morning, he rushed to Evan's
clubhouse, breathless.）：时间跳转至春天，制造悬念（是否找到
了Molly），并以成功“重逢”结尾，升华情感（喜悦+成长），
收束结构。
情节框架提炼
1. 解密过程（冬眠知识+回顾细节+设身处地思考）
2. 安慰与教育（朋友之间的引导与信任）
3. 时间推进与再现（时间线推进至春天+发现）
续写实施要点
保持原文人物性格：Evan 逻辑缜密、冷静推理；James 感情充
沛、依赖朋友。
不新增人物，仅使用Evan 和James。
语言风格延续原文：少年语境+简单日常表达中嵌入科学推理。
保持细节呼应：如池塘、岩石、Molly 外貌特征等。
注意事项（承
接性）
与Evan 说“我知道她在哪儿”后的解释自然衔接。
第二段注意“时间跳跃”逻辑合理，用“春天”、“温暖的早
晨”等自然过渡。
保持语体风格一致（叙述+对话结合）。
巧妙设计建议
巧借“冬眠”科普知识形成“真相大白”。
通过James 的转变（担忧→好奇→欣喜）展现心理成长。
用“春暖花开”“伸出脑袋”的具体画面制造重逢高潮。
二、原文与续写关联分析（含“故事山结构”和衔接点提取表）
事山模式分析（Story Mountain）
开端（Introduction）：James 发现Molly 失踪，情绪崩溃，寻求Evan 帮助。
发展（Build-up）：Evan 调查情况，记录细节，进行资料搜索。
高潮（Climax）：Evan 发现Molly 并非被盗，而可能是进入冬眠。
转折（Turning Point）：Evan 安抚James，解释冬眠原理。
结局（Resolution）：春天回归，Molly 苏醒，朋友重逢。
原文分析表
分析角度
内容
原文反映句
人物刻画
Evan 理性冷静，James 情
感丰富
“Evan patted James on the back...”
“James cried, burying his head in his
arms.”
情感层次
焦急→希望→悲伤→理解
→喜悦
“Someone must have stolen her.”
“Do you think you can find her?”
关键情节点
Molly 失踪、池塘调查、
网上查资料
“Let’s go to the pond.”
“I need to check some facts online.”
语言特色
简洁自然，贴近青少年口
语
“I need a complete description.”
“I’ve found some good clues.”
关键词分析
turtle, lily pond, basking,
hibernating
“She liked basking on a sunlit rock.”
“photos of hibernating turtles”
心理描写
James 的恐慌、依赖、转
为理解
“James cried... eyes glistening with
hope.”
动作描写
跑进来、带路、搜资料
“James burst into Evan’s clubhouse.”
“James led the way to the backyard.”
环境描写
寒冷的十一月、池塘、阳
光岩石
“One chilly November morning”
“she likes to sit on that rock in the sun”
隐含主题
友情互助、科学启蒙、成
长理解
Evan 用知识解决问题，James 逐渐冷
静并理解
情感转折
从“有人偷了她”转向
“她可能冬眠了”
“Calm down, James... There might be
another explanation.”
空间转换
会所 → 池塘 → Evan 家
中上网 → 再次会所
“Let’s go to the pond.”
“Rushing home, Evan called out...”
时间过渡
当天早晨→30 分钟后→春
天早晨
“Meet me in my office in 30 minutes.”
“One warm April morning...”
伏笔与冲突点梳理
类型
内容
伏笔
Molly 每天日出后在岩石上晒太阳；当天突然消失；Evan 查资料得
知冬眠现象。
类型
内容
冲突点
James 坚信宠物被偷，情绪激烈；Evan 需要解释冬眠逻辑并安抚
他。
隐含线索
“chilly November morning”+“basking in sun”+“照片显示冬眠的乌龟”
指向Molly 冬眠而非失踪。
解决方案
Evan 通过网络知识解释龟的冬眠机制，使James 安心，春天Molly
回归自然圆满结尾。
3. 动作、心理、环境描写
动作描写
He rushed across the yard, nearly tripping over his own feet.
他飞奔穿过院子，差点被自己的脚绊倒。
She knelt beside the rock, scanning every inch with trembling hands.
她跪在岩石边，颤抖着双手仔细查看每一寸地方。
He patted his friend gently on the back.
他轻轻地拍了拍朋友的背。
He scribbled something in his notebook.
他在笔记本上匆匆记下些什么。
James clenched his fists, trying to hold back his tears.
詹姆斯握紧拳头，试图忍住眼泪。
Evan raised an eyebrow, his mind working fast.
埃文扬起眉毛，脑子飞快运转。
He peeked behind the bush, hoping for a clue.
他偷偷往灌木后面看，希望能发现线索。
She kicked a pebble absentmindedly, deep in thought.
她心不在焉地踢着一块小石子，陷入沉思。
He opened the website and scrolled down quickly.
他打开网站，迅速向下滚动查看。
James wiped his muddy boots on the doormat.
詹姆斯在门垫上擦了擦他满是泥巴的靴子。
心理描写
A mixture of fear and hope flashed across his face.
他的脸上闪过恐惧与希望交织的神色。
Her heart sank when she saw the empty pond.
看到空荡荡的池塘时，她心都凉了。
He felt a wave of relief washing over him.
一股如释重负的感觉涌上心头。
Doubt crept into his mind as he stared at the screen.
当他盯着屏幕时，疑虑慢慢爬上心头。
His chest tightened with worry.
他因担忧而胸口发紧。
She was overwhelmed by guilt.
她感到深深的内疚。
Curiosity lit up his eyes.
好奇心点亮了他的双眼。
He was lost in thought, unaware of the time passing.
他陷入沉思，浑然不觉时间的流逝。
A sudden realization dawned on him.
他突然明白了什么。
James’s voice trembled with anxiety.
詹姆斯的声音因焦虑而颤抖。
环境描写
A cold breeze blew through the backyard, rustling the fallen leaves.
一阵寒风吹过后院，枯叶沙沙作响。
The morning fog hung low, blurring the garden path.
清晨的雾气低垂，模糊了花园的小径。
The sun peeked through the gray clouds, casting a dim light.
阳光穿过灰云，洒下一道微光。
Dew sparkled on the grass like tiny diamonds.
草地上的露珠像小钻石一样闪闪发光。
The air smelled of wet earth and decaying leaves.
空气中弥漫着湿土和腐叶的气息。
Silence settled over the pond like a blanket.
池塘上空一片寂静，仿佛盖上了一层毯子。
The pond’s surface was still, disturbed only by a falling leaf.
池塘水面静如镜，只有落叶轻轻扰动。
Clouds drifted lazily overhead.
云朵悠悠地飘过头顶。
Footprints were faintly visible in the muddy ground.
泥地上隐约可见脚印。
The clubhouse smelled of old books and pencil shavings.
俱乐部里弥漫着旧书和铅笔屑的味道。
4. 高阶替换词
场景分类常见词高阶替换词
情绪表达sad
sorrowful, downcast, disheartened
表示
“说”
say
remark, respond, declare, announce
动作细节walk
stroll, march, tiptoe, pace
认知思维think
reflect, consider, ponder, conclude
情感起伏happy
delighted, thrilled, overjoyed, ecstatic
固定搭配与语料积累解析
burst into (a place / tears / laughter)
突然进入 / 突然哭起来 / 突然笑起来
James burst into Evan’s clubhouse.（突然冲进俱乐部）
calm down（使冷静下来，动宾短语）
“Calm down, James.”（让詹姆斯冷静）
jot down（快速记下，动词短语）
Evan jotted down notes.（记笔记）
be lost in thought（陷入沉思，系表结构）
He was lost in thought.（陷入沉思）
lead the way（带路，动宾结构）
James led the way to the backyard.
单词/短语词
性
词义
近义词
反义词例句1
例句2
glistening adj 闪闪发
光的
sparkling,
shimmering
dull
His eyes were
glistening with
tears.
The morning grass
was glistening
with dew.
knitted
brow
n.
短
语
紧锁的
眉头
furrowed browrelaxed
face
He listened with
a knitted brow.
Her knitted brow
showed her
concern.
scribble
v
匆匆写
下
jot down,
scrawl
erase
He scribbled
something
quickly.
She scribbled
notes in the
margin.
trace
v
追踪；
寻找线
索
follow, track
ignore
Evan tried to
trace Molly’s last
steps.
They traced the
smell to the
kitchen.
scan
v
扫视；
仔细查
看
examine,
inspect
glance
He scanned the
area for signs.
She scanned the
article for key
facts.
5. Possible Versions(4)
Version 1
Paragraph 1: “Not exactly,” said Evan, “but I know where she is.” Evan's
eyes sparkled with confidence(刻画人物) as he closed the
laptop
. “James, Molly is
hibernating.” James blinked, puzzled(过去分词做adj，主语补语). “Hibernating?” Evan nodded,
explaining(现在分词做伴随动作) that turtles in Northern California often hibernate during
colder months, burying
themselves in mud or hiding under rocks
(现在分词短语做伴随动作).
James's face lit up with hope(人物神态刻画). They rushed back to the pond, where
Evan pointed to the muddy bottom. “She might be under there,” he said. James
knelt down, gently feeling the mud(现在分词做伴随动作). Suddenly, his fingers brushed
against something hard. He carefully cleared the mud, revealing
Molly's shell
(现在
分词做结果状语). Relief washed over him(人物情绪描写) as he saw her safe and sound. “Thank
you, Evan,” he whispered, eyes glistening with gratitude(独立主格刻画人物神态).
Paragraph 2: One warm April morning, he rushed to Evan's clubhouse,
breathless. James burst into the clubhouse, eyes wide with excitement(独立主格神态描写).
“She's back!” he exclaimed. Evan looked up from his notebook, curious(adj 做主语补语).
“Molly?” James nodded, describing(现在分词做伴随动作) how he saw her basking on the
sunlit rock that morning. “Just like before,” he added, beaming(现在分词做伴随动作，神态描写).
Evan smiled, pleased(过去分词做主语补语) that his deduction had been correct. They
decided to document Molly's behavior, creating
a journal to track her activities
(现在
分词做伴随动作). As they worked together, their friendship deepened, bonded
by
their
shared
detective
adventure
(过去分词短语做后置). The mystery of Molly's disappearance had
not only been solved but had also brought them closer, teaching(现在分词短语做结果状
语)them about nature's wonders and the value of teamwork.
Version 2
Paragraph 1: “Not exactly,” said Evan, “but I know where she is.” James
blinked in surprise, pausing his pacing(现在分词做伴随动作). "You do?" he asked hopefully.
Evan nodded, opening his mom’s laptop and quickly pulling up a tab he had
saved. “Look,” he said, turning
the screen toward James
(现在分词做伴随动作). It displayed
a webpage about turtle hibernation patterns. “Red-eared sliders often burrow into
mud or hide under rocks when it gets cold.” He pointed to a pond photo
resembling
the one behind James’ house
(现在分词做后置定语). “If Molly
followed her
instincts, she might have hidden there before winter fully set in.” James frowned
thoughtfully, recalling
the day
(现在分词做伴随动作) she disappeared — it had been
unusually chilly. “I thought I looked everywhere,” he whispered. Evan gently added,
“Sometimes, we don’t see what’s right beneath our feet.”
Paragraph 2: One warm April morning, he rushed to Evan’s clubhouse,
breathless. “Evan! She’s back!” James shouted, his face flushed with
excitement(独立主格刻画人物神态). Evan jumped up from the bench where he’d been
sketching turtles. “Really?” he grinned. They dashed to the pond without
hesitation, sneakers thudding against the soft earth(独立主格). There, basking
on a
familiar sunlit roc
k (现在), was Molly — serene
, unmoved
by the fuss
(过去分词做主语补语).
Her olive shell glistened(无灵主语句), freshly wet(补语), her eyes blinking slowly(独立主格).
James fell to his knees beside her. “I missed you,” he murmured, stroking her
gently(现在分词做伴随动作). Molly extended her neck, recognizing the touch. “You were
right,” he added, glancing
up at Evan
(现在分词做伴随动作). Evan gave a modest smile.
“Sometimes, nature just needs time.” James nodded, his eyes reflecting a mix of
wonder and gratitude(独立主格).
Version 3
Paragraph 1: “Not exactly,” said Evan, “but I know where she is.”
James’s
eyes widened. “You do?” Evan leaned over, scrolling a webpage on her mom’s
laptop, a piece
of
highlighted
text
reading
“
turtles like Molly sometimes
disappear in winter —
not because
they’re lost,
but because
they hibernate
underground.”(独立主格) He switched another page with an illustration of turtles buried
under damp leaves. James furrowed his brow. “But we searched the whole yard.”
Evan replied calmly, “Remember that muddy patch near the garden? She could be
there.” James bit his lip, remembering
a cold morning
(现在分词做伴随动作) he’d seen
Molly pawing at the soil. “I guess I didn’t think of that.” Evan smiled,
“Sometimes, answers come when we stop panicking.” James nodded slowly,
hope flickering back(独立主格).
Paragraph 2: One warm April morning, he rushed to Evan’s clubhouse,
breathless.“Come with me!” James urged, grabbing
Evan’s arm
(现在分词做伴随动作). They
raced to the backyard pond, the early spring breeze catching their laughter(独立主格).
On the sun-drenched rock near the edge, Molly was there — her shell
shimmering(独立主格), her limbs slowly stretching(独立主格) as though waking from a
dream. James dropped to his knees. “She really was hibernating... just like you said,”
he breathed, overwhelmed(过去分词做主语补语). Evan crouched beside him, smiling
modestly(现在分词做伴随动作). “You followed the clues. I just helped piece them together,” he
said, voice calm like a
true detective
concluding a case
(独立主格). Molly turned her
head slightly, as if acknowledging them both. James grinned, eyes mis
ty (独立主格). “We
make a great team, Detective Evan.” Evan chuckled, “And every great case needs a
little faith — and a good friend.”
官方：
“Not exactly,” said Evan, “but I know where she is.” Unfolding
the laptop
and
scrolling
through the picture
(现在分词做伴随动作) she had googled, Evan elaborated,
his voice steady and convincing(独立主格，刻画人物神态). “You see, James. Turtles often enter a
state of hibernation to conserve energy and protect themselves from the freezing
temperatures.” James listened intently, his earlier restlessness gradually giving
way to curiosity(独立主格刻画人物). Evan pointed to a detailed diagram on the screen,
illustrating(现在分词做伴随动作) how turtles bury themselves in the mud. “Molly might have
done just that,” Evan continued. “She could be right there, waiting(现在分词做伴随动作)for the
warmth of spring to wake her up.” James' face lit up with hope(人物神态描写), the
weight lifted off his mind(独立主格). He decided to wait patiently for Molly's return(衔接
下文).
One warm April morning, he rushed to Evan's clubhouse, breathless. “Evan,
she’s back!” James exclaimed, eyes sparkling with joy(独立主格刻画人物). Together, they
hurried to the pond, with brisk steps. There was Molly on her favourite rock,
basking in the sunlight(现在分词做伴随动作), sprawling
lazily
(现在分词做伴随动作), and her eyes half-
closed in contentment.(独立主格) James knelt down, gently stroking her glistening
olive green shell(现在分词做伴随动作). “Thank you.” he said, looking
up at his young
neighbor with gratitude(现在分词做伴随动作). “She was hibernating. You were right all
along.” Just then, Molly stretched out her pale yellow neck, as if chiming in his
words(专供压缩). Evan smiled, not just for his detective success, but for the profound
fulfillment of being a beacon of hope for his neighbors in trouble(递进描写).
