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真正的职场竞争力,从来都藏在本能的善良与担当中 | 镇海高三九月读后续写
真正的职场竞争力,从来都藏在本能的善良与担当中 | 镇海高三九月读后续写【写在前面】十一假期刚过，继续带着学生们进行高三一轮的话题式复习；本周的话题主题是围绕“Morals and Virtues”展开的，正好在备课选择读写训练素材之前做到了今年九月镇海中学的高三开学考的试题。这篇文章第一感觉是“情节好懂，但要是写出来之后看看总差点意思”。它不是那种冲突激烈的应急救助题，而是职场+温情的轻叙事，反而特别考验细节分寸和人物真实感。今天我们就这篇文章来聊一聊最近我一直在高三一轮读后训练中强调的“抓伏笔，塑情节，炼语言”和深度训练教材核心知识。 原文分享： 67. 阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。“And that’s why I think I’d be good for this job,” I finished typing. I was having an interview online and talking with my potential employer, Ms Black. We had not met in person yet. But from what I had read of her requirements for a personal assistant, I knew I wanted the position. She even had a little pet dog who had the final say on any applicant. “Your puppy sounds so cute,” I added. “I love dogs.” Then, I started to worry that typing that was too much at this early stage and stopped myself from adding anything more.The bubbles appeared on screen, showing that the lady was typing something in response, when there was a knock at my front door. My mother was in, and as I was in the middle of an online interview, I asked her to answer it. I heard a lot of muffled (模糊不清的) noise and then my mother called my name. I hurried downstairs, wondering what was going on.Our neighbor was in our entrance hall, holding her little cat, Marley. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. “We were attacked by a big dog,” she wept. Marley was quiet in her arms but alert.“Are you okay?”“Yes. But Marley is hurt,” she nodded shakily and said.“Let’s take Marley to the veterinary (兽医的) hospital. I’ll be with you in a moment.”I took the stairs two at a time. I was supposed to be in the middle of an interview. There was more writing from my potential employer on the screen, but I took no time to read it. I quickly wrote: “So sorry. Have to go. Neighbor’s cat hurt, taking to veterinary hospital.” Half the words were probably jumbled (乱七八糟的), but I clicked “send” and did not wait for an answer. I just seized my bag and ran back downstairs.注意：（1）续写词数应为150个左右；（2）请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。It was late when I got back, and I thought I had blown the online interview.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Despite the late hour, I typed a quick message to reply to Ms Black’s concern.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 
这篇读后续写学生们训练完普遍的情况是看似故事简单好懂，提笔也能写，但写出来总差点意思：要么情绪夸张得不像求职者，要么全程平铺直叙没亮点。很多学生写出来的结果是要么崩要么佛，完全不像求职者；这是最普遍的问题。面对中断面试的后果，学生很容易走两个极端：要不就是写得太重：回来直接崩溃，觉得人生全毁，哭天抢地，完全不符合一个求职成年人的得体心态；要么是写得太轻：回来毫不在意，倒头就睡，又完全违背了前文“十分渴求这个助理岗位”的设定。更隐蔽的问题是，很多学生只写“后悔”，却没写出“求职者的职业素养”——哪怕失落，也会先看消息、先回应，而不是只顾着情绪内耗。 其实原文埋了两个最有区分度的伏笔，也是最容易被忽略的：一是小狗伏笔：Ms Black明确说“她的小狗对所有应聘者有最终决定权”，前文“我”也顺口提了“我喜欢狗”。很多同学续写全程只谈“善良”，完全不呼应这个设定，故事少了最巧妙的闭环，瞬间变成普通的好人好事。二是岗位伏笔：应聘的是私人助理，核心要求就是责任心、应变能力、共情力。救猫这件事本身就是岗位适配度的最好证明，但很多学生只会空泛地说“我人很好”，不会扣到“胜任岗位”的逻辑上，等于把送分点写成了无关项。 再者，学生们容易在情节设定上出问题。两段功能写混，故事节奏全程被打乱；第一段开头是“深夜归家，觉得搞砸了面试”，第二段开头是“回复雇主的关心”。很多学生分不清两段的分工：第一段就把道歉、解释、感悟全说完了，第二段对着开头句只能翻来覆去重复，全程原地踏步；又或者第一段全程只写自己多后悔，完全不看电脑消息，第二段突然就开始回复，衔接特别生硬，情绪转折没有任何铺垫。说白了就是没搞懂：第一段负责“处境+意外发现”，完成情绪转折；第二段负责“沟通+价值落点”，完成主题升华。两段各走一步，不能抢戏也不能缺位。 要想准确地根据原文完成还原度较高的续写文章，我们就要对文本进行精读，挖掘原文伏笔。 原文故事梗概：“我”正在参加心仪的私人助理岗位线上面试，雇主Ms Black提到她的宠物狗对应聘者有最终决定权，“我”顺口表示自己喜欢狗。面试中途，邻居的猫被狗咬伤，“我”仓促中断面试，陪邻居送猫去兽医医院，只发了一段语无伦次的消息就离开了。 续写两段开头： 1. It was late when I got back, and I thought I had blown the online interview. 2. Despite the late hour, I typed a quick message to reply to Ms Black’s concern. 根据故事原文信息和已给出的两段首句，我们找一找原文重要的伏笔之处：
根据以上对文本精读之后，从中搭建两段叙事逻辑框架；其核心原则是第一段「叙事铺陈+情绪转折」，第二段「真诚沟通+主题升华」；根据第一段提示句：It was late when I got back, and I thought I had blown the online interview. 我们要完成的核心任务是：深夜归家→失落自责→发现未读消息→情绪反转。 1. 承接段首：深夜回到家，满心懊悔，觉得自己搞砸了梦寐以求的岗位 2. 细节动作：走到电脑前，发现屏幕上Ms Black发来的多条未读消息 3. 情绪转折：点开消息，发现对方没有指责，反而询问猫的伤势，内心又惊讶又温暖 4. 过渡埋伏笔：平复情绪，决定认真回复对方的关心，为第二段沟通做铺垫 根据第二段提示句：Despite the late hour, I typed a quick message to reply to Ms Black’s concern.我们要完成的核心任务是：真诚道歉→解释原委→呼应伏笔→价值落点。 1. 承接段首：为仓促中断面试真诚道歉，简单说明猫的救治情况 2. 呼应伏笔：提到自己喜爱小动物，也明白助理岗位需要责任心与应变能力 3. 自然收尾：再次表达对岗位的期待，感谢对方的理解与包容 4. 主题升华：比起完美的面试话术，真诚与责任心才是求职者最好的名片 
最后一步亦是很多同学在一轮复习过程中最容易忽略也是最容易训练不到位的地方：那就是从我们的教材中深度训练好词好句；借着复习这个单元，我们可以将以下的词汇、短语及句子用于此篇文章中作为学以复用的好训练题。 核心词汇 1. 品德主题（人教版高中英语 2017 版 必修第三册 Unit 2 Morals and Virtues）
2. 线上交流与求职场景（人教版高中英语 2017 版 必修第二册 Unit 3 The Internet）
2. 线上交流场景（人教版高中英语 2017 版 必修第二册 Unit 3 The Internet）
【下水文】（标注教材语料出处） 【写在后面】
重点短语
1. 品德主题（人教版高中英语 2017 版 必修第三册 Unit 2 Morals and Virtues）
经典句型（配课本原句 + 续写迁移）
- 现在分词作伴随状语（叙事动作描写标配）
【教材出处】人教版高中英语 2017 版 必修第三册 Unit 2 Morals and Virtues 【课本原句】She came into the ward, holding a bunch of flowers in her hand. 【续写迁移】I sat in front of the laptop, staring at the screen nervously. - so ... that ... 结果状语从句（情绪强化句型）
【教材出处】人教版高中英语 2017 版 必修第三册 Unit 2 Morals and Virtues 【课本原句】He was so selfless that he devoted all his life to helping patients. 【续写迁移】I was so worried about the cat that I forgot all about the interview. - 强调句 It is ... that ...（主题升华标配）
【教材出处】人教版高中英语 2017 版 必修第三册 Unit 2 Morals and Virtues 【课本原句】It is the spirit of devotion that makes a person great. 【续写迁移】It is sincerity and responsibility that make an applicant stand out. - although 让步状语从句（转折场景句型）
【教材出处】人教版高中英语 2017 版 必修第二册 Unit 3 The Internet 【课本原句】Although the Internet has many advantages, we should use it wisely. 【续写迁移】Although I interrupted the interview unexpectedly, Ms Black didn’t blame me.
Paragraph 1
It was late when I got back, and I thought I had blown the online interview. Heart sinking, I walked to my laptop, staring at【必修三 U2 句型】 the screen helplessly. I was so anxious about the messed-up interview that【必修三 U2 句型】 I could hardly breathe. I had spent weeks preparing for this position, and now I might have ruined it all. Suddenly, I noticed several unread messages【必修二 U3 词汇】 from Ms Black on the screen【必修二 U3 短语】. I clicked them open, only to find she was asking about the cat’s condition, no anger at all. A warm mix of surprise and relief rose in my chest.
Paragraph 2
Despite the late hour, I typed a quick message to reply to Ms Black’s concern. I apologized sincerely for cutting off【必修二 U3 短语】 the interview abruptly, and explained that I helped the neighbor out of sympathy【必修三 U2 短语】 for the hurt cat. I mentioned I loved animals, and I believed a sense of responsibility【必修三 U2 词汇】 was essential for a personal assistant. It is sincerity and the ability to handle emergencies that【必修三 U2 句型】 make one qualified for the post. I thanked her for her understanding and expressed my continued eagerness for the job.
其实一轮复习的读后续写教学，最忌讳的就是 “题题分开讲，篇篇背模板”。 最好的做法，是把每一道模拟题，都当成课本知识的 “应用题”。学生在必修三 Unit2 学过的道德主题、叙事逻辑、升华句型，不是用来做语法填空的，是可以直接拿过来写作文的。当学生建立起 “学过的就能用” 的意识，续写就不再是靠感觉的玄学，而是有方法、有抓手的得分题。