2025 苏锡常镇二模解析
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
In Los Angeles, California,there was an aquarium( 水族馆)called“Ocean Wonders
Aquarium," located along the scenic coastline. The aquarium was home to a wide
variety of ocean creatures, attracting countless visitors who were amazed at the
colorful tropical fish slow-moving seahorses, graceful jellyfish, and intelligent
dolphins. However, the aquarium had to go through a major restoration, and as of
December lst last year, it closed its doors to the public. The construction was expected
to last until the summer, with the entire project taking more than six months to
complete.
Without visitors, the aquarium grew extremely quiet and felt like an empty space.
The animals, who were used to human interaction every day, now saw very few
human faces, only the familiar caretakers. Something strange began to happen. The
dolphins, once energetic and lively, seemed tired, lacking the usual enthusiasm they
had for play.
One morning, after the caretaker Amanda threw small fish into the dolphin's tank,
the dolphins swam lazily to the tank walls and barely showed any interest in their
favorite meals. They stared blankly into the distance, their usual excitement absent.
“Something's not right,Amanda whispered to herself.
Dr, Harris was called in to investigate. He examined the dolphins and initially
suspected digestive issues. “Perhaps we should reduce their food intake,” he
suggested. “Give them smaller amounts of food and see if that helps with any
potential digestive discomfort.But after a few days, there was no improvement. The
dolphins continued to suffer, showing no interest in food or play. Disappointed and
worried, John, a senior caretaker, gathered the team.“What should we do?’, he asked,
his voice filled with concern.Then, one of the caretakers posed an idea: “Could it be
that the dolphins are lonely without the visitors?”
注意:1.续写词数应为150 左右;
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Paragraph 1: While everyone was doubtful, they decided to try something.
Paragraph 2: As the dolphins started to recover, the staff became more creative in
their efforts.
2025 苏锡常镇二模解析
阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。
In Los Angeles, California, there was an aquarium called “Ocean Wonders
Aquarium,"(过去分词做后置定语) located(过去分词做后置定语) along the scenic coastline. The aquarium
was home to a wide variety of ocean creatures, attracting
countless visitors
(现在分词做伴
随动作) who were amazed at the colorful tropical fish slow-moving seahorses,
graceful jellyfish, and intelligent dolphins(名词并列). However, the aquarium had to go
through a major restoration(主要事件背景原因), and as of December lst last year, it closed its
doors to the public(close 非必要不被动). The construction was expected to last until the
summer, with the entire project
taking
( 现在分词做伴随动作) more than six months to
complete(with 复合结构).
Without visitors, the aquarium grew extremely quiet( 环境描写) and felt like an
empty space. The animals, who were used to human interaction every day, now
saw very few human faces, only the familiar caretakers. Something strange began
to happen(关键变化事件). The dolphins(特别强调，主要), once energetic and lively(adj 做后置补语，对比描写),
seemed tired, lacking
the usual enthusiasm
(现在分词做伴随动作) they had for play.
One morning, after the caretaker Amanda( 人物1) threw small fish into the
dolphin's tank, the dolphins swam lazily to the tank walls and barely showed
any interest in their favorite meals(暗示海豚可能有异常). They(海豚) stared blankly into the
distance, their usual excitement absent( 独立主格刻海豚神态). “Something's not right,
Amanda whispered to herself.
Dr, Harris( 人物2) was called in to investigate. He examined the dolphins and
initially suspected digestive issues( 救援类动作). “Perhaps we should reduce their food
intake,” he suggested. “Give them smaller amounts of food and see if that helps
with any potential digestive discomfort. But after a few days, there was no
improvement(问题继续). The dolphins continued to suffer, showing
no interest in food
or play( 现在分词做伴随动作). Disappointed and worried(adj 做主语补语), John( 人物3), a senior
caretaker( 人物信息), gathered the team.“What should we do?’, he asked, his voice
filled with concern( 独立主格刻画人物).Then, one of the caretakers( 群像人物) posed an idea:
“Could it be that the dolphins are lonely without the visitors(同为语从句)?”
注意:1.续写词数应为150 左右;
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Paragraph 1: While everyone was doubtful, they decided to try something.
Paragraph 2: As the dolphins started to recover, the staff became more creative in
their efforts.
一、原文思路分析
分析项目
内容
续写类型
情感治愈类故事型续写。以动物（海豚）为主角，围绕人类情感关怀
与动物恢复互动能力展开，属于“内向冲突+外部行为反应”的典型续
写结构。
构思思路
聚焦情感线：以“海豚的情绪低落”作为核心问题，引出人类的应对
尝试与转机。
运用因果推动逻辑：做法→反应→调整做法→正面反馈→情绪治愈。
布局方式
双段结构：
1）第一段：描述“开始尝试+逐渐有反馈”，情节由“怀疑”转为
“希望”；
2）第二段：描述“不断创新+全面恢复”，情节由“恢复”转向“升
华”。
框架提炼
1）原问题：海豚沉默
2）尝试策略（如播放人声、展示孩子图画）
3）初步反应（如轻触玻璃、发出声音）
4）增强互动策略
5）情感恢复（跳跃、点击装置等）
实施重点
保持人物设定不变（Amanda、Dr. Harris 等）
海豚形象需具象表现
设置具体细节来体现恢复过程
把握动作、心理、情绪的渐变过程
原文承接
要点
维持角色性格（如Amanda 富有同理心、Dr. Harris 最初理性怀疑）
保留“沉默、失落”的氛围背景
主题围绕“如何唤起动物情绪”延展
续写注意
事项
不引入新角色，仅使用原文已有角色；
合理设计“转机”与“恢复”的节奏感；
保持文风统一（细腻、富有情感）；
使用高级语法与地道表达
巧妙设计
续写建议
利用“虚拟观众”、“互动装置”或“旧照片”等具有象征意义的道
具设置推动故事发展；
通过动作表现情绪；
用环境变化暗示情绪复苏（如阳光照进展馆等）
二、故事山 模式分析等
分析项目
内容
原文反应句 / 补充分析
故事山
开端：海豚失去活力，沉默不动
上升行动：Amanda 寻找方法尝试引导
原文提示情绪低落：“The
pool was silent. The dolphins
didn’t move.”
分析项目
内容
原文反应句 / 补充分析
反应
高潮：首次互动成功（点击玻璃、跳跃
等）
下降行动：继续创新互动方式
结尾：情感与互动完全恢复
续写中通过逐渐恢复动作
（click, jump）达到高潮
原文衔接
情绪线：继续描写海豚的“沉默”状态
与人类的“担忧”
行动线：从Amanda “想尽办法”引出
后续“创造性尝试”
人物设定：Amanda、Dr. Harris 性格延
续一致
“Amanda had tried
everything. They were
feeding well, but nothing
more.” ——续写需承接此
句，引出“精神层面尝
试”
情绪描写
“The pool was silent. The dolphins didn’t
move.”
“She felt helpless.”
奠定了压抑、悲伤的开局
氛围
动作描写
“Amanda called their names. They didn’t
respond.”
“She reached out and touched the glass.”
暗示尝试建立互动的过程
关键转折
Amanda 找到第一种有效尝试（如回应
录音、人声或图像）
海豚做出首次反应（如靠近、点击玻
璃）
续写中构建了关键反转：
“Then a dolphin clicked
back.” / “Luna jumped
unexpectedly.”
伏笔设置
Amanda“曾努力尝试无果”，暗示后续
需要“更有创造力”的方式
海豚并非身体不适，暗示“情感因素”
为主
“They were feeding well, but
nothing more.” → 表明问
题不在生理而在心理
冲突点
人与动物情感无法对接的障碍
Dolphin 沉浸在孤独中，工作人员缺乏
有效方式引导
原文“Helplessness”+“无响
应”+续写初始的
“Everyone was doubtful”共
同构成冲突基础
隐含线索
Dolphin 有“社交依赖性”，喜爱儿
童、回应声音等
Amanda 不放弃，象征着“希望与情感
沟通”
原文中提及“名字”“声
音”“玻璃”，暗示沟通
的可能性
解决方案
制造“模拟社交”场景（声音、照片、
互动装置）
与观众建立远程联系，恢复互动欲望
续写中的“Virtual
show”“Livestream”“Drawin
g wall”等象征创意联结手
段
三、写作分析要点总表（含原文对应）：
分析角度
内容概述
原文反应句 / 对应续写补充
人物刻画
Amanda：富有同情心、不放
弃希望；
Dr. Harris：理性，后逐步转变
态度
原文：Amanda 的坚持；Dr.
Harris“worried it might be permanent”
情感层次
初始压抑 → 怀疑 → 希望
→ 激动 → 共情
原文：helpless → doubtful；续写：
hopeful → emotionally uplifted
关键情节
点
初始沉默→尝试失败→首次回
应→全面恢复
原文沉默→续写跳跃、点击、互动板
出现
语言特色
使用大量心理与动作交叉描
写，加入情感比喻，如“Hope
spread like sunlight.”
示例句：“Her voice echoed
gently”；“Eyes seemed brighter”
关键词分
析
silence, respond, hope,
interaction, healing
多处出现与情感、联系相关的词汇，
如“respond”, “cheer”, “companionship”
心理描写
无助→希望→激动→共鸣
原文“helpless”；续写中 Amanda’s
beaming, “voice filled with cautious
hope”等
动作描写
靠近玻璃、发声、跳跃、点击
按钮
原文：“didn’t move”；续写：
“clicked back”, “jumped unexpectedly”
环境描写
安静压抑→逐渐明亮温暖
续写可增加如 sunlight entering tank,
sounds echoing 等情境设置
隐含主题
情感疗愈、生命的回应、人与
动物的双向链接
“They don’t just crave food. They crave
attention.”
情感转折
由冷漠沉寂→希望再现→情感
共鸣
续写中点击玻璃回应、跳跃即为转折
点
空间转换
从观察平台→玻璃前→互动板
区域
暗示海豚开始主动接近、活动范围扩
大
时间过渡
“One day”, “each morning”,
“then” 等提示时间推进
突出变化是渐进式，便于情节过渡
3. 动作/心理/环境描写推荐英文例句
动作描写
英文句子
中文翻译
She leaned closer to the glass, her fingers
trembling slightly.
她靠近玻璃，手指微微颤抖。
The dolphin slowly circled the tank, pausing
near the surface.
海豚缓慢地绕着水池游动，在水面
附近停顿。
Amanda tapped the speaker, adjusting the
阿曼达轻轻敲了敲音响，小心地调
英文句子
中文翻译
volume carefully.
节音量。
The caretaker crouched by the edge, eyes locked
on the water.
饲养员蹲在边缘，眼睛紧盯着水
面。
Luna flicked her tail and dove beneath the
surface.
露娜摆动尾巴，潜入水下。
The team set up screens around the tank
showing children’s smiles.
团队在水池四周设置了屏幕，播放
孩子们的笑脸。
She pressed her palm gently to the tank wall.
她轻轻将手掌贴在水池玻璃上。
One dolphin tapped the glass lightly with its
nose.
一只海豚用鼻子轻轻地碰了一下玻
璃。
Amanda held her breath as the dolphin
approached.
当海豚靠近时，阿曼达屏住了呼
吸。
A burst of water splashed as the dolphin leapt.
海豚跃起时激起一阵水花。
心理描写
英文句子
中文翻译
A sense of helplessness settled over Amanda. 阿曼达感到一种无助感笼罩心头。
Her heart ached seeing the animals so distant. 看到动物如此冷漠，她心如刀绞。
Doubt crept into her mind as silence lingered. 当沉默持续，她的内心开始充满怀
疑。
She felt a flicker of hope stir within her.
她内心泛起一丝希望。
Worry clung to her like a shadow.
担忧像影子一样缠绕着她。
Amanda was torn between logic and empathy. 阿曼达在理智与共情之间挣扎。
Her chest tightened with anticipation.
她因期待而心跳加快。
A quiet joy bloomed in her heart.
一种宁静的喜悦在她心中绽放。
She was afraid to believe, yet desperate to
hope.
她不敢相信，却又渴望希望成真。
Her smile returned, hesitant but real.
她的微笑回来了，虽然犹豫但是真
实。
环境描写
英文句子
中文翻译
The oncebusy aquarium now echoed with stillness.
曾经热闹的水族馆如今回荡着
寂静。
Rays of light filtered through the surface, casting
moving patterns.
光线穿过水面，投下变幻的光
影。
英文句子
中文翻译
The tanks glowed faintly in the dim interior.
在昏暗的室内，水池微微泛
光。
Outside, the sea murmured in the distance.
外面，大海在远处低声吟唱。
A soft hum of machines filled the silence.
机器的轻微嗡嗡声填满了沉
寂。
Shadows moved slowly beneath the water’s surface.
水面下的影子缓慢地移动着。
A screen blinked to life, glowing blue in the gloom.
屏幕亮起，在昏暗中泛着蓝
光。
The scent of salt and metal hung in the air.
空气中弥漫着盐和金属的气
味。
Drops of condensation clung to the outer glass.
水汽滴附着在外层玻璃上。
The silence was deep, almost sacred.
寂静深沉，几近神圣。
常见词汇的高阶替换
基础词
高阶替换
使用情境
sad
disheartened / downcast / crestfallen 描写失落、沮丧情绪时
happy
delighted / overjoyed / elated
描写高兴、感动情绪时
walk
pace / wander / stride
动作描写，有节奏感
look
gaze / peer / glance
描述眼神动作变化
say
whisper / murmur / declare
人物交流场景，丰富语气层次
4. 地道搭配现象 + 可积累语料
地道固定搭配
搭配短语
搭配含义
使用建议
stare blankly into the distance 茫然地凝视远方表达动物或人类的空洞情绪状态
show no interest in
对……毫无兴趣描写动物情绪转变
a flicker of hope
一丝希望的火花描写人物心理微妙变化
gathered the team
召集团队
人物集体决策情节
可积累语料词汇
单词/短语词性
词义
同义词
反义词
restoration
n.
修复，复原
renovation / repair
damage / destruction
单词/短语词性
词义
同义词
反义词
disheartened adj.
沮丧的，失望
的
discouraged / disappointed encouraged / uplifted
interaction
n.
互动，交流
communication /
connection
isolation / detachment
flicker
n./v. 一闪而过/微光flash / glimmer
darkness /
permanence
withdrawn
adj.
冷漠的，孤僻
的
unresponsive / aloof
outgoing / engaged
例句The aquarium underwent major restoration over six months.
→ 水族馆进行了为期六个月的大修。
A flicker of curiosity returned to the dolphin’s eyes.
→ 海豚眼中重新闪现出一丝好奇。
Amanda felt disheartened as the dolphins ignored their meals.
→ 当海豚对食物毫无反应时，阿曼达感到十分沮丧。
Human interaction was essential to the dolphins’ well-being.
→ 人类的互动对海豚的健康至关重要。
Luna remained quiet and withdrawn, unlike her usual lively self.
→ 露娜异常安静孤僻，和平时活泼的样子判若两人。
6. Possible Versions(3)
【Version 1】
Paragraph 1: While everyone was doubtful, they decided to try something.
Recalling(现在分词做伴随动作) how the dolphins had always reacted joyfully to children’s
laughter, Amanda(人物描写) suggested playing recordings of past visits(可行性方案).
Though unsure(状从压缩), the team set up speakers near the tanks and played audio
clips of crowds cheering and kids giggling(现在分词做后置定语). At first, the dolphins
remained still(神态描写), but gradually, one of them tilted its head, as if listening
closely(状从压缩). Within minutes, another nudged a ball toward the glass(海豚动作描写),
tapping it lightly with its nose(现在分词做伴随动作). Amanda exchanged a glance with
John(辅助人物的描写，衔接原文). “They remember,” she whispered. That evening, they
projected videos of previous performances onto the tank wall. The dolphins
hovered near the screen, tails flicking gently(独立主格刻画海豚). Though no actual people
were present, the familiar sounds and sights seemed to reawaken their playful
spirits(状态描写). By the end of the day, the dolphins were circling the tank in sync
again—a behavior they hadn’t displayed in weeks.
Paragraph 2: As the dolphins started to recover, the staff became more
creative in their efforts. To further stimulate the dolphins (目的状语), Amanda (人物衔接)
crafted colorful paper puppets shaped
like children
(过去分词做后置定语) and waved
them playfully at the tank. Meanwhile, John (人物衔接) installed a small camera,
allowing
children from local schools to livestream and interact by waving and
calling names (现在分词做伴随动作). Surprisingly, the dolphins responded to the camera as
if recognizing the children’s voices (状从压缩). The team also built obstacle courses with
floating hoops and rewarded the dolphins with praise and treats (场景化动作) each
time they participated. Gradually, the tanks echoed once more with splashes and
squeaks (环境描写). Dr. Harris (人物衔接) returned to find the dolphins chasing each other
and performing spontaneous flips (动物场景化动作). “They didn’t need medicine,” he
admitted. “They needed meaning.” The restoration continued outside, but within
the tanks, life had already been restored—through sound, memory, and love (名词并
列).
高级词组搭配：exchange a glance（交换眼神）
hover near（在…附近徘徊）
craft puppets（制作木偶）
interact by waving and calling（通过挥手和呼唤互动）
spontaneous flips（自发的翻转动作）
情绪 & 动作描写亮点短语：
as if recognizing the children’s voices
they remember
reawaken their playful spirits
life had already been restored
tilted its head
nudged a ball
circling the tank in sync
performed spontaneous flips
积累语料：
常见词
高阶替换
同义表达
例句
happy
joyful, spirited
be filled with delight
The dolphins grew spirited once the
voices returned.
play
interact, engage perform tricks, chase
each other
They began to engage with the
projected crowd again.
try
attempt,
experiment with give it a go
The team decided to experiment
with recorded sounds.
think
recall, consider
reflect on, remember
Amanda recalled how kids’ voices
once thrilled them.
【Version 2】
Paragraph 1: While everyone was doubtful, they decided to try something.
Taking
a leap of faith
(情绪点衔接), the staff brought in life-sized cardboard cutouts of
past visitors(解决方案) and arranged them around the dolphin tank. Amanda (人物衔接)
even placed a speaker beneath the tank to play soft recordings of children’s
applause and cheering. At first, nothing changed—the dolphins remained still (海豚状态描
写). But as time passed, one dolphin gently brushed against the glass where a
cutout of a laughing boy stood. The team held their breath (人物衔接). Then another
dolphin swam in loops near the same spot. Encouraged (过去分词或形容词做主语补语), Amanda
(人物衔接) tapped on the glass and called their names softly. One of the dolphins
clicked back—a sound they hadn’t heard in days. “They’re responding,” John said,
his voice filled with cautious hope(独立主格刻画人物状态). The tank no longer felt like a
silent prison but the beginning of a revival(对比描写). Though the idea had seemed odd
at first, it began to prove that these little creatures were really human-like
and cute in nature.
Paragraph 2: As the dolphins started to recover, the staff became more
creative in their efforts. Inspired
by the breakthrough
(过去分词做原因状语), caretakers
organized daily “virtual shows” where dolphins performed while children
watched through livestreams. The dolphins, hearing
cheers from screens and
seeing
waving hands
(现在分词做伴随动作), began leaping again, tossing balls into the air
and splashing playfully(场景动作串并列). Amanda(人物衔接) trained them with visual signals,
holding
up colorful signs with shapes
(现在分词做伴随动作) the dolphins had once learned
to recognize. With each successful trick, she offered praise and a gentle smile. The
dolphins responded not only with movement but emotion(递进句式)—their eyes
seemed brighter, their clicks more frequent(句式相同省略). Dr. Harris(人物衔接) visited again
and smiled as he watched one dolphin
press its nose gently against the glass
(场景词积累),
staring at a child's face on screen.(现在分词做伴随动作) “They don’t just crave food,” he
said thoughtfully, “They crave attention. Companionship.(递进句式)” The silence had
been broken(衔接原文)—by love, effort, and a little creativity(名词并列).
词组搭配：
life-sized cardboard cutouts（等人大小的纸板人）
brush against the glass（轻轻触碰玻璃）
perform virtual shows（表演虚拟节目）
press its nose against the glass（鼻子贴着玻璃）
情绪 & 动作描写亮点短语：
voice filled with cautious hope
eyes seemed brighter
responded not only with movement but emotion
crave attention. Companionship.
动作类：
brushed against the glass
swam in loops
clicked back
leaping again, tossing balls
积累语料：
常见词
高阶替换
同义表达
例句
show
performance, display
routine
They held daily virtual performances
for children.
look at
gaze at, stare at
fix one’s eyes
on
The dolphin stared at the screen like it
saw a friend.
happy
uplifted, emotionally
recharged
show signs of
joy
Their eyes seemed brighter, their
clicks more frequent.
unusual odd, unconventional
surprising
Though the approach was
unconventional, it worked.
